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Utterly Pointless Jokes

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  • Utterly Pointless Jokes

    One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the
    local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem, my
    husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very
    embarrassing. What should I do?"

    "I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you.
    I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will
    motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a
    good poke in the leg."

    In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing
    this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the
    ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.

    "Jesus!", Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the

    "Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr.
    Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is
    your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards
    Mrs. Jones.

    "God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

    "Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr.
    Jones again winked off. However, this time the minister did not
    notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few
    motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her
    husband with the hatpin again.

    The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore
    him his 99th son?"

    Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that
    goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half
    and shove it up your ass!"

    "Amen," replied the congregation.
    Corn + Tomatoes = <3

  • #2
    lol shoulda posted it in the Useless category tho if it was uterless and pointless


    • #3
      Originally posted by Ataris
      lol shoulda posted it in the Useless category tho if it was uterless and pointless
      its not uterless... that would be a mutilated cow. this was utterLY.
      Mayo Inc. - We should change god's name to "Tod"... see if there's any followers. - Mattey


      • #4
        Lol Ataris ur too right
        EvoLd> Roboqueen died again?
        cool koen> :)
        PRiMORDiAL> pfft
        cool koen> not because of a bug
        EvoLd> Lol
        Treachery> meh
        EvoLd> why then?
        PubAceR> women in power dont last
        EvoLd> LOl
        toaster oven reviews