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**Black Mage** · 06-21-2010, 02:05 AM

Dueling

Anyone notice any difference with the new resolutions? First place to look? I have a suspicion that Lofty is playing on a pretty high res.

Well I’ve been dreading writing this recap but Candy King defeated top5squad (50-49) in the (Game) Choke of The Week. This game was the story of an unlikely hero, along with two likely heroes. The game was being dominated by top5squad early. B4sERmaN75_X started off hot (8-3, which was good because he had to go to work soon…finished 11-10), and Riverside (14-10) had 10 kills less than 4 minutes into the match, as top5squad jumped to a 12 point lead. Time for the unlikely hero to make his mark: Bacon, drafted solely for his funny name, started off 0-3 and was 3-6 or so near the midpoint of the game. He then reeled off 7 straight kills to tighten the game and eventually his team tied it at 41. He had help from Lofty (15-10, MVP and one of the likely heroes) who had numerous kills in this stretch also. Top5Squad reasserted itself and made it 47-45, but that’s when Burnt turned on the afterburners. He radared Riverside (who was on 9) quickly after it became a 3v1, giving himself a puncher’s chance. He ran and ate so many greens that I thought he was Snooki eating only salads to get into better shape for season 2 of Jersey Shore (filming now!). However, Jaa (7-10 and was even before the duel with Burnt, ok for a 6*) and Zizu (Even Steven(s)) were just clearly overmatched from spec. It reminded me of the 3v1 Racka won during last TWDT (or TWL I forget), except the complete opposite in style.

Both sides were missing arguably 3 of their best players (Vys, Mythril, Delectable for top5…Kyou, Kid Kaos, Ricko for CK), but this is still a gigantic upset. I thought Top5Squad might go undefeated in warbirds, but that dream ended soon. One last comment…Vys told us before the games started that he wanted to play base and jav because we had enough warbirds and because he was looking for new challenges. Once we lost and Vys discovered Top5Squad doesn’t have any javs, Vys told us he would have played WB. Thanks Vys! (PS Don’t turn this thread into a Vys slamming contest, there are already like 3finity of those and he played well in 2 leagues today).

Now that the closest game is out of the way, we can talk about the blowout: Underground cut Emofucks (50-26). Essentially none of Emofucks starters showed up (possibly with the exception of Kthx who is a fringe starter, 1-10), and there is talk on the forums of Emofucks not having a full line for some of the game. Still, this thing was ugly. In a trend that you’ll see continue later, Ease went +10 (14-4). Chuckle got Jaa’s name tattooed on his ass (so he’d never forget the trade) and went 11-3. Somehow, Ardour manage to go negative in the win. (Still can’t figure out how. Maybe he was baiting for Ease? Maybe he was telling a really dirty joke in squad chat. I know a good one about a nun at bible camp.) A couple of basers and javs filled out the line for Emofucks (along with Kassius, who I still have no idea who he is. He beat me in wbduel once, which isn’t saying much…), who struggled mightily. Rogue almost got to even (9-10).

Ruby regrouped after its surprising base loss to finish off Blood Choke (50-37). High Templar (14-6) MVP’d in the win, and I swear he hasn’t played an unscheduled game in like 5 years. I never just see him chilling or playing some elim, wbduel, or even DDs. He doesn’t have any recorded games in the last month and didn’t play last TWL, yet he dutifully showed up for TWDT. Gotta give him props, he’s the anti-Creature. Ruby was missing its two big guns (Apok, Racka), but still showed some pretty good players who all played well. Blood Choke also showed most of its best line, but they got beat today. In fact, Scarce, who I would have thought was the weak link going into the game, was the only player over .500 for Blood Choke (11-10). Misled was the low man for BC (4-10) and has not looked great in the past few games that I have seen him play (I think I beat him in wbduel recently, even Kassius didn’t let that happen).

EZ or Wut beat Gypsy Humpers (50-39) in the last dueling game of the week. Join me in haikuing:
Simple Mistake rules. (13-8)
He went too low in the draft.
Raspi lowest score?!? (9-9)

And Rendered went pos??? (11-9)
This game was in warbird though.
Bubz not as lucky. (3-8)

Mess could not carry. (12-10)
Where were Stylez, Vash, and Paska??
Had to play three javs.

“Hot” Breath Players of the Week Brought to you by How to Tame Your Dragon (Coming Soon To DVD): Burnt, Lofty, and Bacon- Like the Flyers and Red Sox, it’s not just that they came back to win, it’s against whom and what the situation was in which they did it.

Honorable Mentions: High Templar, Ease, Simple Mistake, Riverside, Scarce, Chuckle

Tiger Woods’ Abstinence Cream ‘”Not” Gonna Do it’ Player of the Week: Kthx- No excuses, didn’t play like a champion.

Dishonorable Mentions: Eelam, Ardour (How??!), Jaa, PhyRe, Misled

**Black Mage** · 06-21-2010, 02:06 AM

Javelin

To be honest I didn’t watch any of these games because I had to get ready for work (*cough man Brazil kicked Ivory Coast’s ass cough*), so this section will be shorter and more stat based.

Candy King (to nobody’s surprise) defeated notop5Javsquad (50-32) to move to 3-0 on the week. Vys did his valiant work here as I’ve already discussed (MVPing in a losing effort). Clearly top5’s intentions are not to win TWDTJ. Balanced scoring led the way to victory for Candy King: Hurricane (11-3), Fludd (11-8), flared (10-6), and Children (9-8) all had between 9 and 11 kills. PhyRe continued his new tradition of subpar play in Candy King wins over top5squad (7-7). Temporary (3-10) and Martyr (4-10) got some playing time in the loss for Top5.

Gypsy Humpers (0-3) finished off a poor day with a loss to Blood Choke (23-50). Maybe Pjotter will put himself in next time, because lZ (3-10), “maybe 6* was actually right” Cuji (2-8), and Displaced (4-10) did not get it done today. They will turn things around when Domi, Paska, Vash, and Cripple show up to the games. Whats that? They are good players who don’t show up that often? Uh oh…. Maketso (6-10) also had a disappointing outcome, but from how bad this score was I’m guessing there was little chance to do better than that. Now to the winners: Blood Choke dominated thanks to the play of captain Thrill. Boss teammates Kid Cudi (11-3) and Scarce (6-5 in 6* role) also helped out. Adding an elite jav in Marge (10-5) to that Boss chemistry worked wonders. Might as well mention Necromotic actually showed and went 8-6 also.

Underground chose EZ instead of Wut (50-41) in a showcase for Ease (19-9). I hear that hypocrit (12-10) tried to desperately hunt out Ease on 9, but due to massive fail just fed him. Underground has a pretty strong jav line and if they can find a better option at 6* (Chuckle went 6-7 there today), they can contend for the title. Anyone who is still reading at this point gets a gold star. Ara was disappointing in the loss (4-10), and Rendered (back from last season’s 6* player of the year in jav) somehow got over twice as many kills in warbird as jav (5-10). Waven (8-6), Zidane (8-5), and Turban (8-10) all got 8 kills for Underground, but Turban was killed out because he’s a spider not a jav. Or so he keeps telling us.

In the last game of the week, Ruby sent Emofucks to an 0-3 start as well (50-39). Emofucks didn’t get embarrassed, but I’m sure Singer (who took care of his own business 10-10) would rather not have had Delic (3-10) play. The rest of his lineup was solid but not great (Rogue, Stayon and steak666 all above 7), and if you put in Exquisite or Aimbot in there (although they aren’t 6*s so I guess we are talking the playoffs or maybe you need Nimrook, Cloth, or Inaphyt) the game might have turned out differently. Raples made ripples through the enemies for Ruby (15-5), and not in game was and had himself a decent one (11-8). Paradise struggled (6-10) in the win for Ruby, and Raples stole all the kills from Chance (7-7) and Draft (7-9).

The Pau Gasol Should Have Been Finals MVP Hot Player of the Week: Ease- Best score in closest game, but Raples was close.

Honorable Mentions: Raples, not in game, Zidane, hypocrit, Vys, Hurricane, Fludd, flared

The Why Didn’t the USA Just Pay off Koman Couliably Before the Match Not Smart Player of the Week: Delic- Four kills lower than nearest teammate in a game that was actually winnable.

Dishonorable Mentions: Temporary, Ara, Martyr, Cuji, Chuckle, Paradise, Rendered, lZ, Displaced

Caps don't forget bidding is open again, but that the 5* cap hit for dropping a player is now active. The TWDT site keeps getting better so keep checking it out and I want to thank Zazu for his hard work there.

**Lizard Fuel** · 06-21-2010, 06:41 AM

For what its worth, I was the starting terr for emofucks, and I think I was all 9 of spikey's teks. He won that match single handedly and deserved MVP. I ended up like 7-10 or something stupid before singer switched with me and stayon specced for the last 5 minutes of the game, then we all went to roof and shot at rocks. But shame on you if you think wingzero can out-terr me. Eat shit faggots

**Ganon-Knight** · 06-22-2010, 02:20 AM

For what its worth, I was the starting bencher for top5squad, and I think I was all 9 of jaa's PMs. He spammed me that match single handedly and deserved MVP. I ended up seeing like 7-10 or something stupid before rasaq joined me and stayed specced for the last 5 minutes of the game, then we all went to ihop and boght pancakes. But shame on you if you think BlackMage can out-bench me. Eat shit faggots

**Lofty** · 06-22-2010, 02:31 AM

Rofl, my shitty 15-10 performance is supposed to bring up res discussion? Give me a break. Had Burnt not come out with his usual clutch, I would have pretty much cost us what would otherwise have been an easy win for the two of us even at 9 deaths each, considering our manner of play in those situations is almost identical with same efficiency in execution.

The reason I played so poorly is because I had gotten drunk with friends that came over the night before, and ended up staying up the rest of the night until after that match was done, and was pretty much on the verge of passing out 10 min before the match and had to go wash my face. I had a number of better performances/clutches last season or whenever it was I last participated in twdt. Had I actually been sober/awake, I think a more realistic 18-6 would have come around rather than dying out like a retard to what seemed like a lineup of pubbers if I recall correctly, save for maybe 1-2 players

**Black Mage** · 06-22-2010, 02:40 AM

Lofty's WB stats last TWDT season:
11-10, 10-9, 9-8, 9-10, 2-3, 8-10, 9-5, 12-8, 18-20(playoffs)...88-83.

I was wondering when the trolls would show up. I've got Lofty in the lead by a slim margin, but kthx hasn't showed yet so its anybody's ball-game

**Lofty** · 06-22-2010, 02:47 AM

Because the stats on paper now speak of what circumstances and alongside what players they were obtained, correct? 9-5 and 12-8 alone are better performances than 15-10, even though I know I had more significant impact in some of those worse record games you listed from what I remember. I think the baseless retort you give in return to me chuckling at your original comment is more trolling than anything else in here =P

**tragiK** · 06-22-2010, 02:52 AM

lofty only guy in the world who says "naw, a 5 inch penis would fit you better" when the girl is marveling at how enormous his schlong is

ur false modesty sucks, we all know ur the 'cock'iest guy in tw

**Lofty** · 06-22-2010, 02:57 AM

Tragik, it's kind of hard to be modest with a name like Lofty, and even my self proclaimed # 1 in my signature. Sorry, it was a nice try on your behalf to call me out for something nonsensical granted what I just underlined, but I'm simply stating facts about my rather bad performance that round =P clearly your views on things are not the same as my own; even 12-9 would have been a better performance in that round and would have reduced the risk of us losing twofold.

**Black Mage** · 06-22-2010, 03:35 AM

Lol and Jaa surges to the top of the leaderboard. He's really getting a rise out of Lofty. This thread might have some stiff competition yet to come, but Lofty was probably boned from the beginning. Sorry Lofty if I judged you wrong, but you seem like the kind of guy who would have a large monitor and some big hardware. Also, just an fyi I edited one of the parts because it had a huge dangling participle. Big penis.

**Ganon-Knight** · 06-22-2010, 03:46 AM

Originally posted by tragiK View Post

lofty only guy in the world who says "naw, a 5 inch penis would fit you better" when the girl is marveling at how enormous his schlong is

ur false modesty sucks, we all know ur the 'cock'iest guy in tw

yeah i mean seriously

all you've got is 'top 5 wb' tied to your forum account

that wb could mean anything

warble bird?
warner bros?
weather balloon?
wheat bread?
weebl and bob?

i mean come on

**Lofty** · 06-22-2010, 04:18 AM

Originally posted by Black Mage View Post

Lol and Jaa surges to the top of the leaderboard. He's really getting a rise out of Lofty. This thread might have some stiff competition yet to come, but Lofty was probably boned from the beginning. Sorry Lofty if I judged you wrong, but you seem like the kind of guy who would have a large monitor and some big hardware. Also, just an fyi I edited one of the parts because it had a huge dangling participle. Big penis.

So Jaa got angry when he realized he's most likely one of the wbs I related to an average level of pub in my earlier statement, quickly made a laughable attempt at saying I was trying to be modest when even my name Lofty is an antonym to modesty plus the other obvious points I rebutted that with, (not to mention it's kind of obvious I'm one of the most arrogant players in this zone), and me making sport of him concerning this is your definition of a rise out of me? I think it's obvious that you realize I'm the one getting a rise out of both you and Jaa, it's just funny that upon noticing this, you use a fallacy to try and flip the circumstance around, just because you are caught in the line of fire from initially making direct rebuttals against me yourself ..sorry, a bit late to jump into spectator mode now with silly fallacies ! =P

Anyway, as far as my monitor/hardware is concerned...yes when my old CRT died I specifically found another one to suit my tastes on ebay a few years ago, a 20 inch Sony Trinitron flatscreen CRT, since I find them to be superior to LCD's as far as refresh rates, the ghost movement issues LCD's have with contrasting light movement games such as Subspace etc...but its still just a 20 inch limited resolution CRT in the end, since I refuse to use LCD's =P

**Black Mage** · 06-22-2010, 04:28 AM

Originally posted by Lofty View Post

So Jaa got angry when he realized he's most likely one of the wbs I related to an average level of pub in my earlier statement, quickly made a laughable attempt at saying I was trying to be modest when even my name Lofty is an antonym to modesty plus the other obvious points I rebutted that with, (not to mention it's kind of obvious I'm one of the most arrogant players in this zone), and me making sport of him concerning this is your definition of a rise out of me? I think it's obvious that you realize I'm the one getting a rise out of both you and Jaa, it's just funny that upon noticing this, you use a fallacy to try and flip the circumstance around, just because you are caught in the line of fire from initially making direct rebuttals against me yourself ..sorry, a bit late to jump into spectator mode now with silly fallacies ! =P

Anyway, as far as my monitor/hardware is concerned...yes when my old CRT died I specifically found another one to suit my tastes on ebay a few years ago, a 20 inch Sony Trinitron flatscreen CRT, since I find them to be superior to LCD's as far as refresh rates, the ghost movement issues LCD's have with contrasting light movement games such as Subspace etc...but its still just a 20 inch limited resolution CRT in the end, since I refuse to use LCD's =P

I was just trying to use sentences that had rock solid euphemisms. The content was utterly dick-all.

**Lofty** · 06-22-2010, 04:30 AM

Originally posted by Black Mage View Post

I was just trying to use sentences that had large erection euphemisms. The content was utterly meaningless.

It was pretty well constructed in light of that motive, though I must admit I missed the play on the word rise; shame

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