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    TWDT Semi-Finals

    This week, powerhouse Thunder took on Baratheon, as the equally alacritous Dun vs Me locked horns with Kamikaze. Thunder and Dun vs Me finished #1 and #2 during the season, whilst Baratheon and Kamikaze clawed their way out of the Quarter-Finals with 3-0 performances across all three leagues, knocking out Terrorist and Team Hilk, respectively.


    Thunder vs. Baratheon
    ROUND 1

    Thunder, true to its name, started (and were carried) by three TWLD champion Thunder vets in byakko (14-10), Ease (9-7), and Obi (7-3), while TWDT-D beast Best brought his big-time game heroics, bolting through the opposition with a mesmerizing 14-9 outing, hauling 5-star 420/Leo DiCaprio in Blood Diamond on his back, and lugging him to safety, then busting an illegal mining operation and uncovering a vast network of conspiracies and getting nominated for an Oscar.

    On the losing side, Rasaq (15-10) went Scarface and took out 15 guys with a grenade-launching M16, but besides his love-interest who went 9-10, the rest of his team played like a bunch of shitty, low paid extras, dying quickly like the worthless cannon fodder they are.

    Tony Montana Rasaq
    Elvira Hancock Demonic
    Cuban Refugee #2 Eelam
    Taco Stand Cook cranium
    Bodyguard #5 Stannis

    MVP: Best

    Thunder vs. Baratheon
    ROUND 2

    Ease's dueling juggernaut continued its romp through TWDT-D unabated, as the Thundarians improved to 8-0 in WB, as Best once again led the charge with a seismic 16-8 performance, with great play from Obi (10-4), Ease (10-5), Turban (8-7), and 420 (6-5).

    Baratheon fared even worse than the first round, failing to hit 30, as Rasaq, Stannis, cranium, Demonic, and Eelam vacillated between 4:10 to 8:10, also known as the Alarm Clock Range. Stannis and co. had a surprising upset over Dreamwin's team in the Quarters but the magic had clearly worn off for the 2-7 WB line that struggled all season.

    MVP: Best


    dun vs me vs. Kamikaze

    There are no stats posted for these games, other than the fact dun vs me won, and the score of the first round was 50-44 in their favor.


    Thunder vs. Baratheon
    ROUND 1

    The Thunder core continued its assault in jav, with team captain Ease (14-7) at the van, followed closely by Turban (13-8), with solid outings from Best (10-9) and Tsunami (10-9), and a Stannis-like performance from Undercut (3-9).

    Baratheon, a proud and noble house who made their fortune patenting Fury, seemed to decline despite a rousing 3-round performance from Euforia (11-10). Cranium/Demonic/Mikkiz/Eelam muddled around with 7/8-10s.

    MVP: Ease

    Baratheon vs. Thunder
    ROUND 2

    Baratheon got high on E as Eelam (16-8) and Euforia (16-7) eclipsed the enemy, entering the fray with supreme confidence in their abilities and dazzling the audience with Euclidean shot geometry.

    In tow, cranium (7-10) and Mikkiz (5-10) were serviceable at best, while Demonic bulleted heavily and hung around ably with a 5-8.

    Thunder had no answer the for erstwhile duo, despite another titanic effort from Ease (14-10), as Best, Undercut, Tsunami, and Turban achieved middling scores.

    MVP: Eelam & Euforia

    Thunder vs. Baratheon
    ROUND 3

    Superhuman being from a distant planet who's only weakness is the Sun and is powered by green krytonian-like Monster energy drinks Ease (19-5) flashed his spandex-laden junk, putting down Spelunky long enough to ravage the enemy camp and knock them out of the playoffs with this Herculean effort.

    As if there was ever any doubt to the abilities of the winner of 5 TWLJ titles in a row, Ease added another ridiculous performance to his already prolific resumé, as not a single player on his team went positive or hit 10 kills.


    byakko (9-10), Best (9-9), 420 (2-8), and Tsunami let the man do his thing, sizzling the likes of Eelam (9-10), Demonic (7-10), Mikkiz (6-10), and cranium (5-10).

    euforia (12-10) went beast mode 1v4 and notched about 6 kills solo at the end putting on an impressive performance, but he couldn't escape Ease's wrath.

    MVP: Ease


    dun vs me vs. Terrorist
    ROUND 1

    Champutate (18-4) put on his tryhard hat for this one. Then he borrowed Ease's tryhard shoes, 24's tryhard goggles, Zidane's tryhard pants, and Cape's...err, cape, fed vampirically on Heaven to sustain himself, then borrowed Babe Ruth's bat that was once struck by lighting and went to fucking town on Terrorist like Shayde swatting at a pinata full of American green cards.

    There are a lot of words to describe this performance, but if Amputate's head gets any bigger, Rough won't be able to hang-on to his coattails as Amp floats off into space.

    24 (11-8) provided good support, while Rough (9-10) did a good job approaching parity, with hulk (5-10) and Heaven (4-7) following up the rear.

    The Kamikazians, who've been prolific in Jav all year, couldn't get it going. Tiny (9-10) and EvilDeed (9-10) did their best, as did Aprix (8-10), but Compelled and Rendered struggled despite contributing in the QF.

    MVP: Amputate

    dun vs me vs. Terrorist
    ROUND 2

    Round two saw a far more even spread among a core group of players who've likely never seen any spread, as Rough (13-9) actually outkilled Amputate (12-4) for once, but still -4 in the +/- category. 24 (10-5) continued his solid play this season, as hulk and Heaven once again hung on for dear life as Amp/Rough/Moby Dick rampaged across the screen, delivering blow after vicious blow.

    skatarius's team once again fell short, despite solid performances from Tiny (9-10), Evildeed (9-10) and aprix (8-10), with Compelled and Rendered's struggles mirroring their R1.

    MVP: Rough


    Baratheon vs. Thunder

    This was a tight match between two strong basing teams, as Mikkiz (50-4, 3 teks) led Baratheon in terr with a stunning and acrobatic tour-de-force, with fantastic sharking from the ubiquitous Cranium (2.9 RPD, 2 teks) and a half-and-half of WAR (2.8 RPD)/NL>Trigger (2.9 RPD, 2 teks).

    Gilder (102-58) ably guarded under, while TJ Hazuki (120-105), Stannis (114-78), SPIDERHATE (114-87) attacked the over, with Rasaq (72-46) subbing in mid-way to give them a bit more punch, pushing hard for flagtime.

    Thunder forced the issue, looking to sweep their way into the final, with Turban (52-13, 1 tek) in terr, behind DOWNFALL (3.0 RPD) and Mcvicar (3.0 RPD)/Dyers Eve.

    They certainly had the edge spider-wise, with strong performances from Ease (147-91), Undercut (133-73), Best (131-75), Jatt (111-80) and TheWadoRooster (109-63), but couldn't shut Baratheon down or hold cram when they did, while Stannis's team punished them with solid crams at every opportunity.

    An exciting game to watch and an exhilarating one to play in, Baratheon continued their strong basing season with another victory, moving onto the finals!

    MVP: Mikkiz


    dun vs me vs. Kamikaze

    In stark contrast to the ENTIRE regular TWDT-B season, both Semi-Final games we're insanely competitive and mind-numbingly close. Despite being down a whopping 7 minutes near the end, Hulk's team managed to mount an historic comeback, powered by strong terring from Cintra (54-8, 1 tek), behind great sharking from hulk (2.9 RPD, 2 teks), and Oder (2.9 RPD, 1 tek), as the Pene combo of Minotar (155-101) and usoi (153-80) led the way, alongside TWLB-finalist Hellkite (151-98), and ambiguously gay duo Rough (127-78) and Amputate (120-78), who both had the exact same amount of deaths -- adorable!

    Another equally exacting basing squad, the Kami had victory within their grasp but crumbled at the end, despite a very strong season in base. aprix (37-11, 3 teks) terred, as big Dwopple (2.8 RPD) led them in shark, partnering up with the versatile Murder (2.8).

    Team Captain skatarius (156-110) brought the fire, with Rab (137-69), stung (136-107), bellflowers (120-110), and Rendered (117-69), as the two squads traded salvos over the flag.

    Ultimately, the dunvsmeans were able to dig deep into their reserves and claim a scintillating victory!

    MVP: Cintra

    And Then There Were 3

    With Power and Vagina not making the playoffs, and Terrorist and Team Hilk getting knocked out in the Quarter-Finals, Kamikaze became the latest victim as dun vs me swept them in the Semi-Finals. Thunder claimed 2/3, while Baratheon moved on to the basing Final against Hulk and co.

    WB of the Week: Best,
    dropping red-hot 16-8 and 14-9 scores in both rounds, leading his team to victory alongside Ease with his vicious rush and dazzling jukes

    Jav of the Week: Amputate,
    putting down a legendary 18-4 performance that wowed the crowd and led to the term "tryhard" to trend on Twitter, then casually propping-up a 12-4 in round 2.

    Baser of the Week: Mikkiz,
    once again proving himself the most valuable player in TWDT-B, notching an insanely impressive 50-4 with 3 Teks, leading Baratheon into its only Finals.

    Player of the Week: Ease,

    dropping great 9-7, 10-5 performances in TWDT-D, then single-handedly willing his team to victory with an otherworldly 19-5 in Round 3 of jav after dropping 14-7, 14-10 performances, and nearly getting his team into the TWDT-B Final with a stellar 147-91 in spider.
    3:Rough> went to a psychiatrist and he said I had something called Anti-Social Personality Disorder loool, what the hell is that
    3:Mattey> that means you're a psychopath you stupid fuck
    3:Rough> LOL?

  • #2
    amp LOL
    SSCU Trench Wars
    Triple Threat
    SSCU Trench Wars TWEL Top 3 Finalist
    SSCU Trench Wars Starting Spider Melee 2003
    SSCU Trench Wars TWLJ Champion (2x)
    SSCU Trench Wars TWLD Champion
    SSCU Trench Wars Michael Schumacher of Racing2
    SSCU Trench Wars Unprecedented Balancing KING
    SSCU Trench Wars TWLJ Top Stats 3 years running

    MAD shoutouts to MUH BOYS atm


    • #3
      Didn't watch any of this but your write-up is great. Good job. U this writer? Am impressed.
      - You need people like me. So you can point your finger and say that's the bad guy.


      • #4
        Good write-up. And an exciting draft so far!
        big sean> L!O!L!
        Cres> ?
        Cres> its mine now.
        destruct <> WATER U DEWIN
        paradise> Dewin? Ill take that. using that now
        destruct <> u welcum
        thix> Lol this shit is ban hannah's.
        cripple> ?
        paradise> ?
        Cres> You can keep that one.