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Ever been unable to find the time to whine, complain or b*tch? Ever had trouble finding the words to say? Well now you don't have to be troubled anymore! With Scott Pakin's automatic complaint-letter generator all the work is done for you!
Take my complaint about With Ease, as an example. The newb...the nerve.
Take my complaint about With Ease, as an example. The newb...the nerve.
Impertinent. Scabrous. Brazen. In case you can't tell, I'm making a direct reference to With Ease, Jr.. The points I plan to make in this letter will sound tediously familiar to everyone who wants to fight the warped, distorted, misshapen, unwholesome monstrosity that Ease's plans for the future have become. Nevertheless, he says that the most valuable skill one can have is to be able to lie convincingly. But then he turns around and says that science is merely a tool invented by the current elite to maintain power. You know, you can't have it both ways, Ease. Ask yourself: What is it about our society that makes maledicent braggadocios like Ease desire to violate values so important to our sense of community? I bet you'll answer the same way that I did, because we both know that we must overcome the fears that beset us every day of our lives. We must overcome the fear that Ease will go to great lengths to conceal his true aims and mislead the public. And to overcome these fears, we must deal with Ease appropriately.
Pardon me for not being able to empathize with surly urban guerrillas, but we must lead Ease out of a dream world and back to hard reality. As mentioned above, however, that is not enough. It is necessary to do more. It is necessary to discuss the advantages of two-parent families, the essential role of individual and family responsibility, the need for uniform standards of civil behavior, and the primacy of the work ethic. Let me try to put this in perspective: There is a simple answer to the question of what to do about his smears. The difficult part is in implementing the answer. The answer is that we must change the world for the better. It troubles and amazes me to think that Ease should put his own house in order before he tells others what to do. I don't think anyone questions that. But did you know that I should state this explicitly? Trapped by the cognitive dissonance engendered by hard evidence and common sense, he feels obligated to squander irreplaceable national treasures in a besotted attempt to justify his disquisitions. My goal for this letter was to provide a trenchant analysis of With Ease, Jr.'s crotchets. Know that I have done my best while trying always to shed the light of truth on the evil that is Ease. Let an honest history judge.
Pardon me for not being able to empathize with surly urban guerrillas, but we must lead Ease out of a dream world and back to hard reality. As mentioned above, however, that is not enough. It is necessary to do more. It is necessary to discuss the advantages of two-parent families, the essential role of individual and family responsibility, the need for uniform standards of civil behavior, and the primacy of the work ethic. Let me try to put this in perspective: There is a simple answer to the question of what to do about his smears. The difficult part is in implementing the answer. The answer is that we must change the world for the better. It troubles and amazes me to think that Ease should put his own house in order before he tells others what to do. I don't think anyone questions that. But did you know that I should state this explicitly? Trapped by the cognitive dissonance engendered by hard evidence and common sense, he feels obligated to squander irreplaceable national treasures in a besotted attempt to justify his disquisitions. My goal for this letter was to provide a trenchant analysis of With Ease, Jr.'s crotchets. Know that I have done my best while trying always to shed the light of truth on the evil that is Ease. Let an honest history judge.