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  • #16
    After a few minutes, Nate spoke. "Jack, I have someone to introduce you to."

    Jack looked surprised. "Someone to introduce me to?" Jack looked around, and
    then looked carefully back at Nate. "This something to do with the Big Guy?

    "No, no," replied Nate. "This is more personal. I want you to meet my son."
    Nate looked over at the nearest sand dune. "Sammy!"

    Jack watched as a four foot long desert rattlesnake crawled from behind the
    dune and up to the stone base of the lever.

    "Yo, Jack," said the new, much smaller snake.

    "Yo, Sammy" replied Jack. Jack looked at Nate. "Named after Samuel, I
    assume?"

    Nate nodded. "Jack, I've got a favor to ask you. Could you show Sammy around
    for me?" Nate unwrapped himself from the lever and slithered over to the
    edge of the stone and looked across the sands. "When Samuel first told me
    about the world, and brought me books and pictures, I wished that I could go
    see it. I wanted to see the great forests, the canyons, the cities, even the
    other deserts, to see if they felt and smelled the same. I want my son to
    have that chance - to see the world. Before he becomes bound here like I
    have been.

    "He's seen it in pictures, over the computer that you brought me. But I hear
    that it's not the same. That being there is different. I want him to have
    that. Think you can do that for me, Jack?"

    Jack nodded. This was obviously very important to Nate, so Jack didn't even
    joke about taking a talking rattlesnake out to see the world. "Yeah, I can
    do that for you, Nate. Is that all you need?" Jack could sense that was
    something more.

    Nate looked at Sammy. Sammy looked back at Nate for a second and then said,
    "Oh, yeah. Ummm, I've gotta go pack. Back in a little bit Jack. Nice to meet
    ya!" Sammy slithered back over the dune and out of sight.

    Nate watched Sammy disappear and then looked back at Jack. "Jack, this is my
    first son. My first offspring through all the years. You don't even want to
    know what it took for me to find a mate." Nate grinned to himself. "But
    anyway, I had a son for a reason. I'm tired. I'm ready for it to be over. I
    needed a replacement."

    Jack considered this for a minute. "So, you're ready to come see the world,
    and you wanted him to watch the lever while you were gone?"

    Nate shook his head. "No, Jack - you're a better guesser than that. You've
    already figured out - I'm bound here - there's only one way for me to leave
    here. And I'm ready. It's my time to die."

    Jack looked more closely at Nate. He could tell Nate had thought about
    this - probably for quite a while. Jack had trouble imagining what it would
    be like to be as old as Nate, but Jack could already tell that in another
    hundred or two hundred years, he might be getting tired of life himself.
    Jack could understand Samuel's decision, and now Nate's. So, all Jack said
    was, "What do you want me to do?"

    Nate nodded. "Thanks, Jack. I only want two things. One - show Sammy around
    the world - let him get his fill of it, until he's ready to come back here
    and take over. Two - give me the fourth request.

    "I can't just decide to die, not any more than you can. I won't even die of
    old age like you eventually will, even though it'll be a long time from now.
    I need to be killed. Once Sammy is back here, ready to take over, I'll be
    able to die. And I need you to kill me.

    "I've even thought about how. Poisons and other drugs won't work on me. And
    I've seen pictures of snakes that were shot - some of them live for days, so
    that's out too. So, I want you to bring back a sword.

    Nate turned away to look back to the dune that Sammy had gone behind. "I'd
    say an axe, but that's somewhat undignified - putting my head on the ground
    or a chopping block like that. No, I like a sword. A time-honored way of
    going out. A dignified way to die. And, most importantly, it should work,
    even on me.

    "You willing to do that for me, Jack?" Nate turned back to look at Jack.

    "Yeah, Nate," replied Jack solemnly, "I think I can handle that."

    Nate nodded. "Good!" He turned back toward the dune and shouted, "Sammy!
    Jack's about ready to leave!" Then quietly, "Thanks, Jack."

    Jack didn't have anything to say to that, so he waited for Sammy to make it
    back to the lever, nodded to him, nodded a final time to Nate, and then
    headed into the desert with Sammy following.
    Over the next several years Sammy and Jack kept in touch with Nate through
    e-mail as they went about their adventures. They made a goal of visiting
    every country in the world, and did a respectable job of it. Sammy had a
    natural gift for languages, as Jack expected he would, and even ended up
    acting as a translator for Jack in a few of the countries. Jack managed to
    keep the talking rattlesnake hidden, even so, and by the time they were
    nearing the end of their tour of countries, Sammy had only been spotted a
    few times. While there were several people that had seen enough to startle
    them greatly, nobody had enough evidence to prove anything, and while a few
    wild rumors and storied followed Jack and Sammy around, nothing ever hit the
    newspapers or the public in general.

    When they finished the tour of countries, Jack suggested that they try some
    undersea diving. They did. And spelunking. They did that too. Sammy finally
    drew the line at visiting Antarctica. He'd come to realize that Jack was
    stalling. After talking to his Dad about it over e-mail, he figured out that
    Jack probably didn't want to have to kill Nate. Nate told Sammy that humans
    could be squeamish about killing friends and acquaintances.

    So, Sammy eventually put his tail down (as he didn't have a foot) and told
    Jack that it was time - he was ready to go back and take up his duties from
    his dad. Jack, delayed it a little more by insisting that they go back to
    Japan and buy an appropriate sword. He even stretched it a little more by
    getting lessons in how to use the sword. But, eventually, he'd learned as
    much as he was likely to without dedicating his life to it, and was
    definitely competent enough to take the head off of a snake. It was time to
    head back and see Nate.

    When they got back to the US, Jack got the old RV out of storage where he
    and Sammy had left it after their tour of the fifty states, he loaded up
    Sammy and the sword, and they headed for the desert.

    When they got to the small town that Jack had been trying to find those
    years ago when he'd met Nate, Jack was in a funk. He didn't really feel like
    walking all of the way out there. Not only that, but he'd forgotten to
    figure the travel time correctly, and it was late afternoon. They'd either
    have to spend the night in town and walk out tomorrow, or walk in the dark.

    As Jack was afraid that if he waited one more night he might lose his
    resolve, he decided that he'd go ahead and drive the RV out there. It was
    only going to be this once, and Jack would go back and cover the tracks
    afterward. They ought to be able to make it out there by nightfall if they
    drove, and then they could get it over tonight.

    Jack told Sammy to e-mail Nate that they were coming as he drove out of
    sight of the town on the road. They then pulled off the road and headed out
    into the desert.

    Everything went well, until they got to the sand dunes. Jack had been
    nursing the RV along the whole time, over the rocks, through the creek beds,
    revving the engine the few times they almost got stuck. When they came to
    the dunes, Jack didn't really think about it, he just downshifted and headed
    up the first one. By the third dune, Jack started to regret that he'd
    decided to try driving on the sand. The RV was fishtailling and losing
    traction. Jack was having to work it up each dune slowly and was trying to
    keep from losing control each time they came over the top and slid down the
    other side. Sammy had come up to sit in the passenger seat, coiled up and
    laughing at Jack's driving.

    As they came over the top of the fourth dune, the biggest one yet, Jack saw
    that this was the final dune - the stone, the lever, and somewhere Nate,
    waited below. Jack put on the brakes, but he'd gone a little too far. The RV
    started slipping down the other side.

    Jack tried turning the wheel, but he didn't have enough traction. He pumped
    the brakes - no response. They started sliding down the hill, faster and
    faster.

    Jack felt a shock go through him as he suddenly realized that they were
    heading for the lever. He looked down - the RV was directly on course for
    it. If Jack didn't do something, the RV would hit it. He was about to end
    humanity.
    USS Banana after years of superior jav play has amassed 17999 kills, he is 1 kill away from 18k, Type ?go Javs FOR A GAME OF HUNT (no scorereset) -Kim
    ---A few minutes later---
    9:cool koen> you scorereseted
    9:Kim> UM
    9:Kim> i didn't
    9:cool koen> hahahahahahaha
    9:ph <ZH>> LOOOOL
    9:Stargazer <ER>> WHO FUCKING SCORERESET
    9:pascone> lol?

    Comment


    • #17
      Jack steered more frantically, trying to get traction. It still wasn't
      working. The dune was too steep, and the sand too loose. In a split second,
      Jack realized that his only chance would be once he hit the stone around the
      lever - he should have traction on the stone for just a second before he hit
      the lever - he wouldn't have time to stop, but he should be able to steer
      away.

      Jack took a better grip on the steering wheel and tried to turn the RV a
      little bit - every little bit would help. He'd have to time his turn just
      right.

      The RV got to the bottom of the dune, sliding at an amazing speed in the
      sand. Just before they reached the stone Jack looked across it to check that
      they were still heading for the lever. They were. But Jack noticed something
      else that he hadn't seen from the top of the dune. Nate wasn't wrapped
      around the lever. He was off to the side of the lever, but still on the
      stone, waiting for them. The problem was, he was waiting on the same side of
      the lever that Jack had picked to steer towards to avoid the lever. The RV
      was already starting to drift that way a little in its mad rush across the
      sand and there was no way that Jack was going to be able to go around the
      lever to the other side.

      Jack had an instant of realization. He was either going to have to hit the
      lever, or run over Nate. He glanced over at Sammy and saw that Sammy
      realized the same thing.

      Jack took a firmer grip on the steering wheel as the RV ran up on the stone.
      Shouting to Sammy as he pulled the steering wheel and ran over Nate.

      "Oh well," Jack thought to himself "better Nate than lever."
      USS Banana after years of superior jav play has amassed 17999 kills, he is 1 kill away from 18k, Type ?go Javs FOR A GAME OF HUNT (no scorereset) -Kim
      ---A few minutes later---
      9:cool koen> you scorereseted
      9:Kim> UM
      9:Kim> i didn't
      9:cool koen> hahahahahahaha
      9:ph <ZH>> LOOOOL
      9:Stargazer <ER>> WHO FUCKING SCORERESET
      9:pascone> lol?

      Comment


      • #18
        I hope no one read that entire thing. I sure didn't.
        4:DEEZ NUTS> geio hopefully u smoke ur last cig right now
        4:Geio> yo wont ever happen again
        4:Geio> DEEZ?
        4:Geio> LOLOL
        4:DEEZ NUTS> LOL
        4:scoop> cant tell if deez was trying to be a good influence or telling him to die LOL
        4:spirit> LOL
        4:Geio> LOLOL THINK HE TOLD ME TO DIE
        4:Geio> FUCKING DICKHEAD

        Comment


        • #19
          naw hehe
          this thread failed miserably :/

          Comment


          • #20
            Cant believe i read the entire thing to find out it wasnt even funny..
            which makes it funny after all, i guess.
            Nice way to steal my time, tho

            U didnt write that all by urself, i hope?

            Comment


            • #21
              Why do cemeteries have fences around them?

              [spoiler]people are dieing to get in[/spoiler]
              sleepyjoe> this is a mental health ward not a competitive video game

              Comment


              • #22
                Good story if you're ever bored or need to pass half an hour away.

                Comment

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