hoo boy 12 hours ago i was in handcuffs

[Jerome Scuggs]

so halfway through cruising a blunt my buddy josh decides he's hungry and needs some chicken, we go to raising canes, i'm sitting shotgun holding the blunt and a motherfucking sheriff deputy comes walking towards us. he informs us that he can smell the weed all the way around the building (it was good shit) and pulls us all out of the car and searches us. we almost pulled it off but the driver had a motherfucking dugout in his car (RULE #1 NEVER RIDE DIRTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) but the dude didn't find weed, so he just gave the driver a summons for paraphernalia, and let us go.

motherfucking deputy only had two pairs of handcuffs, so while he was searching the vehicle he cuffed the 'biggest threats', who turned out to be me and the driver (who is an eagle scout teddy bear), leaving the one guy who has a prior for assault on a cop free to walk around and even eat his chicken while the driver and i were fucking cuffed, on the ground, in a drive thru. motherfucker!

yup itt jerome scuggs doesn't go to jail yet again. p.s. i am currently toking on the very roach that got us busted

[the_paul]

Jerome can you write an autobiography? I'll buy it

[paradise!]

lol another jerome-getting-caught-or-nearly-caught-with-weed story, yet i'm hooked

[Fidel Castro]

Sounds kinda stupid.

[PH]

omfg heart palpitations

(excerpt from favorite jerome weed story, coming to america or something like that)

[Jerome Scuggs]

i dont know if i ever posted this one, but the law finally caught up to me. i had just picked up a co-worker who had moved here from cali and was moving weight, like 2 pounds a day. we went and got some daquiris and were heading to a house when i got pulled over doing 35 in a 25. so in my single-cab pickup truck there was two styrofoam cups filled with booze, a backpack with at least a quarter-pound of dank, and a person who had warrants in the state of washington and oregon as well as one here.

i was so ready to go to jail on that one that when he asked me to sign the speeding ticket, i didn't even think about it as i flicked my cigarette butt right down onto that cop's shoes.

two weeks later, my friend got pulled over because one of his exhaust pipes had come off the mount. somehow that routine stop led to him sitting in the back of a cop car while the cop found a cellophane wrapper with a single stem in it and charged the dude with possession.

so yeah now i have 1 speeding ticket to my name

[Dameon Angell]

I'm running out of bathroom reading, Jerome write me something that'd make me laugh til the shit flies out.

[the_paul]

keep them coming jerome

[Da1andonly]

still waiting

patience running out

[Jones]

this quicksand shit is boring as fuck

[Jerome Scuggs]

alright one time, about 2 years ago, i was parked in a parking lot outside of wendy park, a small park buried in a neighborhood near my old high school, around 8pm. i was waiting to meet up with my best friend, and we were gonna smoke a few bowls and then play airsoft. so i had an ounce of schwag in my pocket, a bong in a gym bag behind my seat, and an airsoft m-16 replica chillin on my passenger seat.

we used to do this all the time, and never thought much of it. noone really every came to the park, including cops. but this one night in particular, i had pulled up and was smoking a cigarette, waiting for homedude to show up. cop drove down the street, but i didn't think anything about it. i kept smoking on my cig, but i noticed the cop had turned in and was creeping across the parking lot... straight at me. about 50 feet away he turned on his spotlight and i just sort of squinted and gesturing like why the hell am i being spotlighted?! he stops the car like 20 ft from my door and gets out, asking me if i was aware that the park closed at sundown. i wasn't aware of that, most parks around here close at 10 or 11 at night. but before i could say that, he had walked around to the other side of the truck, shined his flashlight in, and saw the airsoft gun. he jerked through my window, grabbed it, and yelled for me to freeze. he then came around and pulled me out, spun me around, and shoved me on the side of the truck. i quickly told him it wasn't a real gun, and he informed me of how close i had been to being shot. awesome. he stated he was going to perform a search, etc.

at this point i was just like ... fuck. started reciting what i was gonna say to my parents and that sort of thing. he proceeded to pat me down heavy as fuck, grabbing my balls and shit. i was wearing some baggy cargo pants, with my cigarettes/ounce of weed in my left pocket and my cellphone/lighters/pens in my right. my heart stopped as he patted my pockets, and he grabbed the cigarettes in my left pockets... and then kept going.

as he was doing this he asked what i was doing here at the park, and because he had spun me around i had a clear view of the shreveport-barksdale bridge. this somehow got me thinking, and i told the cop that i was meeting up with a friend who was from out of town, lived an hour away in Ruston, and that the park was one of the few places he knew that was near the interstate exist and clyde fant riverway. we were gonna meet up, head to my place, and play airsoft with friends. as i was talking he had proceeded to search my truck, which was just a single cab. he pulled the seat forward and looked behind them, and his flashlight swept over the gym bag with the bong... but he didn't look in it. or smell it, i guess.

that's when i started thinking that this guy was probably looking for weapons, or booze, or maybe like massive amounts of drugs or something. i don't really remember the rest, he just told me not to carry the airsoft gun in a conspicuous place, told me that the park closed at dark and if i understood that, etc. and just like that, he drove off. i then called homedude, and we went home and smoked tons of weed. jesus christ. how am i still alive and not in jail? i know people who get pulled over for not using their blinker, and within 5 minutes have a k-9 unit sniffing out their shit.

[paradise!]

once you get into the drug scene, apparently shit gets interesting. all my buddies who smoke tons of weed have great stories to tell. but shit always catches up to them, e.g. getting kicked out of university.

better watch yourself jerome. haha, this is like a weird interpretation of the gambler's fallacy.

[project dragon]

Your friends must not be very smart with their smoking habits then.

[Epinephrine]

In Canada if the police stop you for nothing and find your drugs, you may get off scot free.

http://csc.lexum.umontreal.ca/en/200...2009scc34.html

[paradise!]

Your friends must not be very smart with their smoking habits then.

figured that was implied in the 'smoking tons of weed' part