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(i did't write this)
An allegory by KittyHawk. See if your "thickie skull" can grab this:
All I care about is fun too, so I go to the local gym and I find the guys who
are playing basketball and I steal their ball and I run around yelling
"Oklahoma! Oklahoma! Oklahoma!" and bouncing the ball off their heads. That's
my preferred way to play basketball. Boy is it fun!
But the other day when I did that, they beat me up and threw me out of the
gym. I went and whined to the gym owner and told him I was a paying customer
and that I wanted a court reserved for my own version of basketball.
Amazingly, they said yes, even though the court was originally designed for
actual basketball! Now me and a bunch of losers like me run around yelling
every night. Every once in a while, one of us tries to play real basketball,
but we suck at it and it is no fun. So we go back to our silly game and we
have fun.
The big mean basketball players try to tell me that I shouldn't be doing this,
and when they don't have enough players, they try to make me play with them.
They tell me their game is far richer, requires more strategy, more skill, and
is more fun. They do not understand the sophisticated strategy involved in
running around yelling and bouncing the ball off the other guy's head. They
are fools. Sure, there is no passing, no picks, no give-and-go, no zone
defense, no 3-point shot, and none of the elements that make basketball
interesting, but we got a ball and a court, so it's basketball. And most of
all it's FUN!
So they started keeping track last week of the best teams in the basketball
court. I don't play basketball, but I made them post the best teams in my
game right up there with the real basketball players. It makes them mad when
my team is on top, but we are the best team of all. Nary a finer group of
people running around yelling will you ever see.
Sometimes I wonder if my little game is threatening basketball's existence.
After all, there's only 30 people at my gym, and I have over half of them
playing my stupid game now. Sometimes, there aren't even enough to play a real
game of basketball. But I don't care. My game is just as good, and those
basketball players are mean and arrogant and always block my shots anyway.
If the entire sport of basketball just died because no one in town was left to
play it, I wouldn't care, because I can play my stupid game 500 other places in
town. I don't need a basketball court. Sure, it will be sad for all the
people who like basketball, and I will have to look elsewhere for a place to
play when my gym closes. But it won't be my fault they couldn't get people to
play. The world does not need a game like basketball (though at the moment I
can't really think of another sport quite like it). But the world needs ME,
running around yelling and bouncing the ball off people's heads. Why? Because
I think it is FUN!
PuT tHaT iN yOuR pIpE aNd SmOkE iT.
-KittyHawk
P.s. EvEr NoTiCe HoW hArD iT iS tO lOoK rAtIoNaL wHeN yOu TyPe LiKe ThIs? EvEn
WhEn YoU uSe BiG wOrDs LiKe "PaRaDiGm" Or "EsChAtOlOgIcAl" Or "HeRmEnEuTiCs" ??
An allegory by KittyHawk. See if your "thickie skull" can grab this:
All I care about is fun too, so I go to the local gym and I find the guys who
are playing basketball and I steal their ball and I run around yelling
"Oklahoma! Oklahoma! Oklahoma!" and bouncing the ball off their heads. That's
my preferred way to play basketball. Boy is it fun!
But the other day when I did that, they beat me up and threw me out of the
gym. I went and whined to the gym owner and told him I was a paying customer
and that I wanted a court reserved for my own version of basketball.
Amazingly, they said yes, even though the court was originally designed for
actual basketball! Now me and a bunch of losers like me run around yelling
every night. Every once in a while, one of us tries to play real basketball,
but we suck at it and it is no fun. So we go back to our silly game and we
have fun.
The big mean basketball players try to tell me that I shouldn't be doing this,
and when they don't have enough players, they try to make me play with them.
They tell me their game is far richer, requires more strategy, more skill, and
is more fun. They do not understand the sophisticated strategy involved in
running around yelling and bouncing the ball off the other guy's head. They
are fools. Sure, there is no passing, no picks, no give-and-go, no zone
defense, no 3-point shot, and none of the elements that make basketball
interesting, but we got a ball and a court, so it's basketball. And most of
all it's FUN!
So they started keeping track last week of the best teams in the basketball
court. I don't play basketball, but I made them post the best teams in my
game right up there with the real basketball players. It makes them mad when
my team is on top, but we are the best team of all. Nary a finer group of
people running around yelling will you ever see.
Sometimes I wonder if my little game is threatening basketball's existence.
After all, there's only 30 people at my gym, and I have over half of them
playing my stupid game now. Sometimes, there aren't even enough to play a real
game of basketball. But I don't care. My game is just as good, and those
basketball players are mean and arrogant and always block my shots anyway.
If the entire sport of basketball just died because no one in town was left to
play it, I wouldn't care, because I can play my stupid game 500 other places in
town. I don't need a basketball court. Sure, it will be sad for all the
people who like basketball, and I will have to look elsewhere for a place to
play when my gym closes. But it won't be my fault they couldn't get people to
play. The world does not need a game like basketball (though at the moment I
can't really think of another sport quite like it). But the world needs ME,
running around yelling and bouncing the ball off people's heads. Why? Because
I think it is FUN!
PuT tHaT iN yOuR pIpE aNd SmOkE iT.
-KittyHawk
P.s. EvEr NoTiCe HoW hArD iT iS tO lOoK rAtIoNaL wHeN yOu TyPe LiKe ThIs? EvEn
WhEn YoU uSe BiG wOrDs LiKe "PaRaDiGm" Or "EsChAtOlOgIcAl" Or "HeRmEnEuTiCs" ??
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