Silly shit you say to telemarketers

[Bioture]

You know those annoying telemarketing calls? How do you respond to them?

btw i'm asking because i'm probably going to get a telemarketing job partime - its the only thing available right now

[ÆNIMA]

I feel bad for telemarketters, but I still dislike it when they call.

My brother's favorite: "Look, it's a really bad time to call, there's an ambulance here." click

One of mine:

Telemarketter: "Hello sir, how are you doing this day?"

Me: "Fine, but you know what...you shouldn't have let me do this."

Telemarketter: "Sir?"

Me: "Letting the customer talk has got to be one of the biggest mistakes, because it gives me a chance to hang up." Click

After making up new ones and stuff I started feeling bad, so I asked them to put us on the No Call list, and they haven't called back once

[Arc]

Usually you just say "Leave me the hell alone or ill send the mormans on you!" or something like that

[stark]

we have a telezapper

[Xog]

Nice avatar, Arc :-P i stared at it for like 5 minutes.. no joke haha

[ConcreteSchlyrd]

Don't need to anymore:

https://www.donotcall.gov/

[Troll King]

Go watch the film Boiler Room starring Giovanni Ribisi.

It's a Saturday morning. Seth is sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast. He has several IPO contracts out on the table. He reads as he eats. The PHONE RINGS.

SETH: Hello?

SALESMAN: Hi, this is Ron calling you from the Daily News. How you doing this morning?

SETH: I'm not interested.

SALESMAN: Okay. I'm sorry to have bothered you. Have a nice day.

SETH: That's it? That's your pitch? You consider that a sales call??!

SALESMAN: Well, ummm...

SETH: You want to sell me a paper right? Well you guys call me every Saturday and I get the same half-assed attempt. You wanna close me? Then sell me.

SALESMAN (hesitantly): Alright.

SETH: Go ahead, start again.

SALESMAN: Okay... Hi, this is Ron from the Daily News. How you doing this morning?

SETH (smiling): Shitty. What do you want?

SALESMAN: It's not what I want, sir... it's what you want.

SETH: Alright, now you're talking. What are you selling?

SALESMAN: I'm offering you a subscription to the Daily News at a substantially reduced price. We're trying to reach out to people that have never had home delivery before.

SETH: So, everyone else that already has a subscription is getting fucked on this one huh?

SALESMAN: ...Yeah, I guess so.

SETH: Good, I can live with that. Now why do I want your paper? Maybe I should get the Times or the Voice.

SALESMAN: Well the Village Voice is free, sir, so if you want it you should certainly pick it up. But the Daily News offers you something no other paper can, a real taste of New York. We have some writers on staff that have been with us for over fifteen years. We have the best features! More photographs than any other daily in New York! And we have the most reliable delivery in the city! Now what do you think??!!

SETH: Alright, Ron. Now that was a sales call. Good job!

SALESMAN: So are you going to buy a subscription?

SETH: No. I already get the Times.

CLICK.

[Facetious]

Didn't you once make fun of somebody because you got paid 18/hr and your job was easy to find and you're the best blah blah blah...

[ÆNIMA]

Originally posted by Arc
Usually you just say "Leave me the hell alone or ill send the mormans on you!" or something like that

Mormon

[Machine of God]

classic Sienfeld
Yes I'm very interested in your product but I'm really busy right now, why don't you give me your home phone number and I'll call you back later?

Oh you don't want me to call you at home? Now you know how I feel!

or

Hi, I'm selling blah blah blah, are you interested?

Yes, I am. <click>

If you really want to cause them grief, tell them that you are very interested and you are going to go get a pen to get down all the details, then just set the phone down and see how long it takes before they hang up.

[Arc]

Originally posted by ÆNIMA
Mormon

Same thing =P

[Fit of Rage]

Marketer: Hello sir, is this a bad time?

Me: Actually, I'm in the middle of dinner; how about you give me your phone number and your estimated dinner time, and I'll give you a call back, okay?

[bloodzombie]

sales guy: I'm calling to tell you about our special offer blah blah blah... we're offering a free cell phone blah blah"

you: I GET A FREE CELL PHONE? YAY!!

him: blah blah..

you: YAY! A FREE CELL PHONE! YAY!!

him: blah blah..

you: ALRIGHT!! I CANT WAIT TO GET MY FREE CELL PHONE!! YAY!!

[Arc]

Originally posted by Xog
Nice avatar, Arc :-P i stared at it for like 5 minutes.. no joke haha

Ya i did too except for like 30 min

[geekbot]

you: ALRIGHT!! I CANT WAIT TO GET MY FREE CELL PHONE!! YAY!!

Sounds like crank yankers, only they called you