Mafia 2020 #2: Shipwrecked

[the_paul]

To the rest of you townies who couldn't reason their way out of a paper bag, lets do a little exercise while we wait for WillBy where I do my best to get your collective IQs into the double digits.

Let me explain exactly how this would have played out if I actually was scum, there are basically 2 things I could have done. The first one is simple, it would have been to not say a fucking thing. There is absolutely nothing for scum to gain by calling attention to themselves. Nothing, not a single thing. Especially at this stage of the game. I would have played vanilla townie asking "hmm why were there no night kills!!!? I'll just wait for information I guess !!!" like the rest of you fiddlefucks.

Second scenario, if I was dumb as sack of rocks and did claim that I tried a night kill as a 1 shot vigi even though I were scum, I sure as shit would not claim to have targeted whoever the alleged doctor said they protected. What I would do is say that I targeted somebody completely different, get that person lynched as the potential godfather. If somehow that didn't officially end the game, then I would have the mafia night kill be to shoot backwards in the fucking head because doctors cannot protect themselves, which would absolutely end the game.

If a single person not named Voth can try any way to reason out how I could be scum and still try that move, and can do so coherently, I'll eat my keyboard. Until then, and until WillBy mercy kills this game, you bunch of townies can sit here and know that you are all so stupid that you would fuck up a wet dream.

The only suspense left is trying to figure out why the mafia didn't kill anyone last night. I hope one of you townies turns out to be bulletproof or something and never mentioned it, because that would truly be the cherry on top of everything.

[the_paul]

nothing like a good "ah what the hell, i'm dead anyway" flailing in the early afternoon. i really forget how awesome forum mafia until i see someone throw the hail mary "i'll vote myself as a last resort and hope everyone has an epiphany."


die scumbag


WillBy let's drag this motherfucker to the big oak tree at center square


ps: nothing personal paulie, you know i love you, but man it felt fucking amazing to tie this shit together. i'm glad it wasn't too complicated of a web that you spun, because everyone is totally out of practice.

Can't wait for this game to end with my lynch as town 1-shot vigi and watch these fucking morons scramble to try to explain why they believed you. Your whole theory is predicated on my sudden onset Down's Syndrome, and they're eating it up like candy. It hasn't taken you any effort, but I'm sincerely thrilled you're about to win, because everybody else is simply too fucking stupid to deserve a victory. I'm looking forward to seeing who your accomplice is, because right now I'm honestly not sure. Sucks Exalt didn't know the game started and left me to try to make chicken soup out of chicken shit.

Well played to only Voth (and his partner in crime I guess). Hopefully I don't see any of you fucking idiots in 2021.

[WillBy]

Vote Tally:
the_paul - 4 (everyone except sdrawkcab)

Missing votes: sdrawkcab

Travelling for work today, I'll plan on changing phase tonight (hoping sdraw gets a vote in before then)

[Voth]

Good Lord you guys are really going to fall for this? If I were scum I would have won the game by saying nothing at all, I didn't have to say anything in the first place. This is the worst logic I've ever seen, and everyone not named Voth is a brain dead fucking moron.

Vote the_paul
Willby put us out of our misery.

You guys are really buying the logic that 1. I should put faith in the other townies when we have had 0 successful night actions and 2 townie lunches, and 2. That I would roleclaim for no reason on the day mafia is going to win the game. There is absolutely 0 plausible reasons that I would roleclaim today if I were mafia. None whatsoever.

nothing like a good "ah what the hell, i'm dead anyway" flailing in the early afternoon. i really forget how awesome forum mafia until i see someone throw the hail mary "i'll vote myself as a last resort and hope everyone has an epiphany."


die scumbag


WillBy let's drag this motherfucker to the big oak tree at center square


ps: nothing personal paulie, you know i love you, but man it felt fucking amazing to tie this shit together. i'm glad it wasn't too complicated of a web that you spun, because everyone is totally out of practice.

[the_paul]

Good Lord you guys are really going to fall for this? If I were scum I would have won the game by saying nothing at all, I didn't have to say anything in the first place. This is the worst logic I've ever seen, and everyone not named Voth is a brain dead fucking moron.

Vote the_paul
Willby put us out of our misery.

You guys are really buying the logic that 1. I should put faith in the other townies when we have had 0 successful night actions and 2 townie lunches, and 2. That I would roleclaim for no reason on the day mafia is going to win the game. There is absolutely 0 plausible reasons that I would roleclaim today if I were mafia. None whatsoever.

[Beast]

Voth, I've been watching you seen I was a teenager, watching you jav in 07 was fun to watch

[Beast]

Vote the_paul

nope, I just want to like follow you every game as a captain, the-Paul clearly too mentally delusional to lead

[Vehicle]

Have you ever considered that I actually am just dim?

[Voth]

Meanwhile, in the scum chat right now...

TP: yeah, you have to jump on the wagon now if we are gonna have any chance at all. I'm toast. The voth train just ran me over at full speed. CHOO CHOO

V: ok sounds good

TP: make sure to make your explanation as vague and dimwitted as possible, because there's really no good defense.

V: will do

[Vehicle]

Actually, what in the actual fuck is Vehicle rambling on about? Anyone else catch his bullshit "Paul must be an insane vigilante, where his power doesn't work" things? That doesn't even fucking exist. So what's the point of a statement like this then? To send a subliminal message that Paul is the town vig and not scum, and actually whoever the scum team really is tried to kill me.

I said that specifically because paul said he got a "successful" result and then no one died. Wouldn't he have to have been insane then? Don't take my stupidity for anything more than it is.

Also, for some reason my 2005 brain remembered you as a chick, apologies.


At first I was thinking voth's multi-post tirade was misdirection and he was a bulletproof godfather.

But then it dawns on me that backwards said he protected Voth before t_p admitted to trying to kill him, thus giving voth no reason to go so hard on paul other than conviction.

I add that to the shitty way paul roleclaimed, and the fuzzy math for him to be shooting up the place, and the convenience of double-posting to caveat that it was a 1-shot thing and he's only town now and I'm going to:

vote the_paul

[Voth]

Incorrect, my message was that I performed a successful shot, but did not kill anybody.

I had to take the shot, come on now. How could I know mafia wouldn't get a kill off? If they did, the game would be over (if this game makes any sense). You don't need to spin it because I've already handed everybody all the nails needed to lynch me, but we both know I couldn't sit here and not use my 1 shot on the last night.

Bullshit. Vanilla townies are the only ones that have died and there are 5 people left. The chance of a doctor or roleblocker or other action modifying role hitting right is higher than you taking the game into your own hands with not a single solitary shred of information to go on, not even a gut feeling you can justify with any chatter, because there hasn't been any.

You are way better at this game than that. A little rusty though, because this play was weaksauce.

[the_paul]

By the way, if you are a vigilante and target someone that the doctor protected, you would get a "your kill was unsuccessful" return, not a successful action that just didn't happen for some reason. No way.

Incorrect, my message was that I performed a successful shot, but did not kill anybody.

I had to take the shot, come on now. How could I know mafia wouldn't get a kill off? If they did, the game would be over (if this game makes any sense). You don't need to spin it because I've already handed everybody all the nails needed to lynch me, but we both know I couldn't sit here and not use my 1 shot on the last night.

[sdrawkcab]

Day 2 lynch

Vote Tally:

Vehicle- 1 (Voth)
Voth - 1 (Vehicle)
sdrawkcab - 2 (the_paul, kyler)
kyler - 1 (Beast)

Missing Votes from: sdrawkcab

Then backwards, voth, vehicle moved their votes to kyler after this for day 2 lynch kyler

[sdrawkcab]

day 1 lynch

Originally posted by WillBy View Post
Vote Tally:

Halp - 2 (sdrawkcab, beast)
kyler - 1 (Voth)
Exalt - 1 (the_paul)
the_paul - 2 (Vehicle, Voth)
sdrawkcab - 1 (Halp)

Missing votes from Exalt.

As it stands, we are set to lynch both Halp and the_paul. Phase change in idk, an hour or so.

This vote is partially to spur Exalt to come back with a lecture on the Gamblers fallacy as in games past because it is legendary every time, and also to just not let two of us die Day 1. I'll take the risk... Halp should be scum this game. lil fk

unvote Paul
vote Halp

[Voth]

Actually, what in the actual fuck is Vehicle rambling on about? Anyone else catch his bullshit "Paul must be an insane vigilante, where his power doesn't work" things? That doesn't even fucking exist. So what's the point of a statement like this then? To send a subliminal message that Paul is the town vig and not scum, and actually whoever the scum team really is tried to kill me. But no chance that Paul is just full of shit... more likely that Willby made up a neutered Vigilante shitrole that no one has ever heard of...oh, and made it a 1-shot.

Did I seriously peg the scum team on like Page 2 of this game while trolling for scum? Legendary if so.

Paul today, Vehicle tomorrow, and that's game.