Your football team? (Soccer for you american people)

[ShadowDragons]

To be fair I think the linesman should've have seen that. Most of Carrols body was behind the line when he pulled the ball back out of the goal . And if linesman didnt run in a retarded way, they may actually see more.

[Fallen Angel]

The only good football team...

...is a dead football team.

[ZeUs!!]

I'm also socially insecure

[Hero*]

just like they are fucking up man city right now

And just like Man U is doing better than them?

[eehh]

Yea i hope spurs dont lose them like they have done with every other good player.

which "every other good player" have we lost? explain!

And just like Man U is doing better than them?

at least manure got one point when they lost yesterday. not many others can do that..

[Brettles]

at least manure

i found that amusing

which "every other good player" have we lost? explain!

sol campbell
rebrov (record signing and he sits on the bench for 2 years or something then they free transfer him)
Postiga : young starlet , ok he sucked but did he ever get more then a feww starts to settle in, also cost us 7 mill
zamora: 3.5 mill buy then hes gone just as quick as he came,

and on another note santini came and left. but thats a good thing casue jols doing a great job.

[ogron]

lol fallen's just mad he plays bench

[Troll King]

Postiga : young starlet , ok he sucked but did he ever get more then a feww starts to settle in, also cost us 7 mill

Question: are talented young male football players regularly called "starlets"?

[ZeUs!!]

Courtest of The Fiver daily newsletter

EYES WIDE SHUT
Over the years, the Fiver's admired all the slapstick greats. Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, Groucho Marx, heck even Massimo Taibi. But while most of these legends have long-since gone to the great wet fish in the sky, their spirit lives on in hapless linesman Rob Lewis. Look how he scrambles down the touchline, eyes staring at a nearby divot rather than the field of play! Marvel at the way he completely misses Pedro Mendes' late winner, even though it was a good yard over the line! And chuckle heartily at the way he insists he did nothing wrong!

"I was doing my primary job, which was to watch for offside," Lewis stammered to the Shropshire Star today. "I pride myself on being relatively fast over a short distance but by the time the ball landed, I was still 25 yards away from goal and it was impossible to judge if it had crossed the line. I am disappointed because I always like to get decisions right. But there was nothing I could have done differently - apart from run faster than Linford Christie." Or have his contact lenses/glasses prescription updated etc, and so on.

Still, his blunder has at least reignited the smouldering debate about whether football should - perish the thought! - actually use some of the video technology available to it. Arsene Wenger and Sir Alex Ferguson certainly think so; the latter telling MUTV he'd give referees 30 seconds to make up their minds over a controversial decision. "30 seconds is about the same amount of time it takes to organise a free-kick or take a corner or a goal-kick. So you wouldn't be wasting a lot of time."

True. And it would enable not just dodgy goals but penalties to be looked at too (bad news for Robert Pires and Wayne Rooney, good news for football). But while the FA seem open-minded about the whole thing, Fifa's director of communications Markus Siegler is, it's fair to say, less keen. "Fifa is strongly against the use of video evidence," he spluttered. "We just have to accept the decision last night of the referee and his assistant. There is no point arguing about that. It's part of football." Perhaps - but it won't be much consolation to Spurs fans if they miss out on Europe by two points, will it?






Sod it, I might as well post the rest of the email...

* * * * * * * * * * * *

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"Liverpool need a striker but although two and two might look like four, it could also be three or five" - Answers to what Kevin Keegan is talking about c/o Manchester City FC, City of Manchester Stadium, Manchester.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

I THINK, THEREFORE I AM

James Beattie is absolutely sure he should be an England player. He won't be dissuaded from the idea, even if you remind him he's only scored three goals this season. Even if you point out that Wayne Rooney, Jermain Defoe, and Michael Owen are better strikers than him. Eeeeven if you poke him in the guts and, once you've retrieved your finger, suggest he could lose a pound or two. Hence, he is delusional. Worse, he's harping on about injustice.

"The disappointing thing was that there was no explanation for why I was omitted from the Euro 2004 squad," he whined, ignoring the fact that he only scored two more than Les Ferdinand, 102, last season. "But I'm sure that if I get in the [Everton] team I will be back in Mr Eriksson's thoughts in no time." The only thing worse than one ranting fantasist, of course, is two ranting etc. and so on.

Cue David Moyes, then, for whom spending GBP6m appears to have had the same effect as sunstroke. "If he's banging in goals for Everton, people will be clamouring for him to be back in the England squad," he said. "Jamie was the one we always wanted," he added, hastily binning Yakubu's CV. "We knew the competition was very fierce for him. His goals-per-game ratio is excellent. He's hard working and honest."

All of which bears no relation whatsoever to the fact that Birmingham have at last completed the signing of Robbie Blake from Burnley. Things were delayed somewhat, perhaps by a Mr 10% hoping to become Mr 20%, but the GBP1.25m move has now been confirmed. "Robbie is a player who I am confident can make the step up into the Premiership," said Steve Bruce. Being a cheap replacement for the injured Mikael Forssell and Dwight Yorke was nothing to do with it, then.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

THE RUMOUR MILL

Graeme Souness fancies bringing Luis Boa Morte to St James' Park, and he'll even chuck in Lee Bowyer.

Michael Dawson won't be leaving the City Ground for less than GBP6m, apparently. Bad news for Charlton, but at least they're still favourites to snap up Stephane Henchoz.

The stage is set for a tearjerking reunion between Glenn Hoddle and Dean Richards.

* * * * * * * * * * *

NEWS IN BRIEF

David O'Leary has gone all cold over signing Pompey's Amdy Faye.

Wantaway Welshman Robbie Savage has been relegated to Birmingham's reserves in a bid to get him to withdraw his transfer request.

West Ham and Brighton have each been fined GBP10,000 by the FA for their part in the brawl that marred their Championship match on November 13.

And Liverpool have signed Valencia defender Mauricio Pellegrino on a six-month contract with an option for another year.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

TONIGHT'S TV & RADIO

Five: Dutch Football: Feyenoord v PSV Eindhoven (4.25am)
"You've had two weeks boozing and partying to come up with imaginative ideas for the TV & Radio section and the best you can do is: 'Let's ask the readers?' cries Mark Rea.

Sky Sports 1: FA Cup Classics (6pm)
"Bah! We're not the ones getting paid for this. Well, technically, as I read it during work hours I am getting paid for it, but that's besides the point." Mmm. What happened to the 'goodwill to all men' ethos?

Futbol Mundial (6.30pm)
Fortunately Lawrence MacCormack is more forthcoming: "Why don't you ask readers for their no doubt hilarious New Year's resolutions? You'll probably have torn the bejesus out of it by the end of the week, but it's worth a go. I'm afraid my resolutions are of the 'eat less, earn more' variety so I can't really help kick it off. "

Southampton v Fulham live (7pm)
Lucky Helen Tomkins isn't so shy. "My resolutions include: "1. Completely switch off every time my best mate complains about her size 8 'overweight' frame." Switch off what? Her fridge?

BBC Radio 5: Sport on 5 (7pm)
"2. Find new source of money. And 3. Find nice new man, preferably supporting the same football team as myself. Can't cope with any more petty squabbles. Actually come to think of it, could the Fiver help me out on this one? Are there any nice Liverpool fans out there looking for a gorgeous 31-year-old?"

Talk Sport: Kick off (7pm)
At the risk of playing Cupid, the Fiver asks all suitors to form an orderly line to the left.

Newstalk 106 (www.Newstalk106.ie): Off with Ger Gilroy (7pm)
And if that doesn't rock your boat, send your new year's resolution failures to the.boss@guardian.co.uk by midday tomorrow, marked "failure isn't so bad".

[NaiLed]

yeah, The Fiver is great. thanks for introducing it to us mike

TK: yes

[eehh]

sol campbell

ok, cant argue with that, but he is a fuckhole!

rebrov (record signing and he sits on the bench for 2 years or something then they free transfer him)

rebrov was never good in england. he got 30 games in 01/02 and 29 games in 00/01. only 10 goals for 59 matches.

Postiga : young starlet , ok he sucked but did he ever get more then a feww starts to settle in, also cost us 7 mill

how did he cost us 7mill? we payd porto £6,250,000, and sold him back for £5,000,000 (or £3 mill + mendes).. helder played in 19 matches and scored one goal.

zamora: 3.5 mill buy then hes gone just as quick as he came

did only cost £1,500,000, and he was a part of the defoe-deal. i call that a good deal!

[eehh]

Question: are talented young male football players regularly called "starlets"?

often, but dont know if its correct use of english, though..

[Troll King]

Okay. I was just wondering, because in North America, the word "starlet" usually refers to a pretty, young actress on the rise to fame. You're more likely to hear someone say that "Scarlett Johansson is one of the most talented starlets in Hollywood" than you would "LeBron James is one of the most talented starlets in the NBA". The latter would probably lead to someone in his posse kicking your teeth in. Scarlett Johansson's posse would likely just give you an autographed photo, but you can probably sell the teeth for more on eBay.

[ZeUs!!]

Scarlett the starlet?

[Troll King]

She's the only example I could think of that has any credibility.