RIP Mitch Hedberg

[Facetious]

Hilarious stand-up comedian if you didn't know who he was, he died yesterday of unknown causes, definitely a shame. One of the few comedians who managed to be funny without being negative or putting people down. Sucks.

[Ilya]

couldn't agree more

he was golden

[SaucyKing]

Me and my mom still laugh at his 'fruit on the bottom, hope on top' joke.

'Tis sad indeed. :crying:

[hogo]

I had no idea who he was until BZ posted about him in another thread. face you might be able to answer this did he do a show on comedy central a while ago?

sad to him go...

[Facetious]

yeah he did

[Facetious]

i didnt read the other thread
but he deserves his own thread anyway

[za gophar]

he has a comedy central presents

[bloodzombie]

I know I'm overlapping a little, but I think there's different stuff on here anyway.. but for anyone who didn't read the stupid thread (you're better off), here's some quotes from Mitch Hedberg:

I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.

My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, I said "No, but I want a regular banana later, so, Yeah."

I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

I had a bag of fritos, they were texas grilled fritos. These fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of something, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on, better flip that frito, dad, you know how I like mine.

I had a stick of Carefree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.

I got an ant farm. Them fellas didn't grow shit.

This product that was on TV was available for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. We can't tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is going to hard

I saw a human pyramid once. It was totally unnecessary.

I wrote a letter to my dad - I wrote, "I really enjoy being here," but I accidentally wrote rarely instead of really. But I still wanted to use it so i crossed it out and wrote, "I rarely drive steamboats, dad - there's a lot of shit you don't know about me. Quit trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator." This letter took a harsh turn right away...

Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn't even get his degree

Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupis... one of those two doesn't sound right.

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.

That would be cool if you could eat a good food with a bad food and the good food would cover for the bad food when it got to your stomach. Like you could eat a carrot with an onion ring and they would travel down to your stomach, then they would get there, and the carrot would say, "It's cool, he's with me."

If you had a friend who was a tightrope walker, and you were walking down a sidewalk, and he fell, that would be completely unacceptible...

My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got half way. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.

I wish I could play little league now. I'd be way better than before.

I hate flossing, I wish I just had one long curvy tooth.

The next time I move I hope I get a real easy phone number, something like 2222222. People will ask, "Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?" I'll say, "Just press two for a while, when I answer, you'll know that you've pressed two enough."

I like buying snacks from a vending machine because food is better when it falls. Sometimes at the grocery, I'll drop a candy bar so that it will achieve its maximum flavor potential.

On a traffic light yellow means yield, and green means go. On a banana, it's just the opposite, yellow means go ahead, green means stop, and red means, where'd you get that banana?

My roommate says, "I'm going to take a shower and shave, does anyone need to use the bathroom?" It's like some weird quiz where he reveals the answer first.

I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. There's a large out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.

I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're fucking relentless.

I think Pringles initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles is a laid back company. They said "Fuck it. Cut em up."

An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You would never see an "Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order" sign, just "Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."

I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut... I don't need a receipt for the doughnut. I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, Don't even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here... It's in my file at home. ...Under "D".

[Pearl Jam]

too many drugs, mitch

the gross thing is that i watched his comedy central special for the first time on my roommate's computer...this morning

[SaucyKing]

I'm sigging a few of those. Even reading them makes me burst out laughing again.

[iLDuce]

Damn, what a way to wake up. Mitch has brightened up many of my days listening to his cd in the car after work. He'll be missed.

[wadi]

I can't say I'm surprised, although I agree it's really depressing. I saw him at a show in San Diego last fall and I was shocked at how bad it was. He was not in good shape during the show, forgetting jokes, repeating jokes, fidgetting with notebooks he brought on stage for no apparent reason, and didn't seem to know where he was. And I don't mean all that in the normal Mitch kinda way. My roommate, who went with me to the show, thought he might have been on heroine, and less than 6 months later.. kinda makes you wonder.

A worse thing couldn't have happened to a funnier guy. A real shame.

[Evasive]

How did he die so young?

[genocidal]

Yeah some of those lines definitely look promising having never heard him before. If anyone has his routine on their computer and doesn't mind sending it to me IM me (I think I have my AIM shit posted) or just PM me. RIP though.

[SaucyKing]

What Gen said, send them to me, too. I didn't see a lot of his routines.

It's a shame he died, what did he OD on?