tongue rings

[Jeenyuss]

Personally, i'm not a fan.

1:Jeenyuss> nickname please tell me your story
1:NICKNAME> it's EATING YOU ALIVE
1:NICKNAME> fine
1:NICKNAME> only because I died and lost my 23 shrap
(NICKNAME)> #prom
NICKNAME> Sit back
NICKNAME> relax
NICKNAME> for I will tell you a tale
Jeenyuss> you can't have 23 shrap
NICKNAME> A TALE THAT WON'T MEASURE UP TO YOUR HYPE
NICKNAME> i got it for bty for winning pure pub
NICKNAME> it wasn't 23, but it was large and in charge
Jeenyuss> oh i see, delightful
NICKNAME> quite
NICKNAME> ALright
NICKNAME> It's new years eve
NICKNAME> at my friend Lisas house
NICKNAME> every other year the old gang parties at lisas
NICKNAME> (the high school gang, were still really tight)
NICKNAME> so this year at Lisas, I am the poorest of the poor
NICKNAME> and because I am the single most entertaining drunk alive
NICKNAME> People feed me booze
NICKNAME> because all I had was scotch, for I could not afford new booze
NICKNAME> Anyways, I am shit faced, something fierce
NICKNAME> when she appears
NICKNAME> Enchantress!
NICKNAME> My friend Adam brought his girlfriend (Amanda) and her best friend (Heather)
NICKNAME> These are key names for the rest of this story
NICKNAME> so
NICKNAME> I'm single at this point in time for quite some time
NICKNAME> and although my ex girlfriend of 3 1/2 years is there, (we had broken up 6 months or so earlier)
NICKNAME> it's not weird
NICKNAME> because she's now dating one of my two best friends
NICKNAME> so I decide that this girl passes my high standards
NICKNAME> apparently my buddy bryan went after her too (I found this out later)
NICKNAME> but I was oh so sexually appealing, and oh so hilarious
NICKNAME> (actually, I was dumb. I apparently spanked myself with a ping pong paddle while singing a song I can't remember)
NICKNAME> (and also kept losing in pool, but claimed I won, even though she witnessed said events)
NICKNAME> for the record
NICKNAME> I'll need occasional laughs, or 'uh huhs' in here
NICKNAME> or I feel like i'm talking to myself
NICKNAME> and will stop
Jeenyuss> is this heather or amanda
NICKNAME> Heather
NICKNAME> Amanda is Adams girlfriend
NICKNAME> we call her the Gargoyle
Jeenyuss> was she a voice actor for the cartoon?
NICKNAME> because i'm sure late at night she's perched on a ledge somewhere scaring children
NICKNAME> but thats another story
NICKNAME> Huh? cartoon?
Jeenyuss> that cartoon was fucking awesome
Jeenyuss> gargoyles
NICKNAME> No
Jeenyuss> STONE WARRIORS BATTLE
NICKNAME> but thats an AWESOME cartoon
NICKNAME> I have the song on my play list
Jeenyuss> i liked brooklyn a lot
NICKNAME> was he the red one?
Jeenyuss> i had the card game
Jeenyuss> i think so
NICKNAME> I liked the main guy
Jeenyuss> the one with the long ass beak
NICKNAME> whatever his name was
NICKNAME> and the little green guy
NICKNAME> yeah, the red one
Jeenyuss> yeah the smallest one was pretty bitching too
NICKNAME> the blue one was the dumb one and the green one was the kid
Jeenyuss> i hate how all cartoons have stereotypical fat guys
NICKNAME> meh
NICKNAME> ANYWAYS
NICKNAME> back to my tale
NICKNAME> so I won over this fine lass with such awesomeness it overpowered her
NICKNAME> (apparently I followed her around drunk off my ass, but she was high and didn't notice, plus she wanted me for some very odd reason)
Jeenyuss> did you hit her
Jeenyuss> that attracts women, i hear
NICKNAME> Now, it should be noted that when I found out I had a shot, i stopped drinking and started sobering up
NICKNAME> I didn't, but I should have
NICKNAME> beating women is step one of making them love you
NICKNAME> treating them like bitches is step two
NICKNAME> SO
NICKNAME> we hook up a bit, but nothing serious happens because this house is filled with like, 60 people
NICKNAME> and theres nowhere thats alone
NICKNAME> so we basically just end up making out downstairs in front of all my friends, who try to embarass me as much as possible through antics
NICKNAME> The night ends (happy new years!) and we have to go our seperate ways, we exchange phone numbers, yadaa yadaa
NICKNAME> a few days later, I still haven't called her (3 day rule!) and On wednesdays I have hockey
NICKNAME> when Adam says "She's coming to hockey"
NICKNAME> so i'm all like sweet, I don't have to call her
NICKNAME> well dumbass Adam shows up late, and I basically say three words to her before I have to go and play
NICKNAME> which sucked, but we go play (WIN!) I play awesome (wooo) and all was right in the world
NICKNAME> so all of us are hanging out after the game (theres a bar attached to the rink)
Jeenyuss> i don't know how to skate
NICKNAME> and she's clearly interested in me still, even shooting down our goaltender to much hilarity
Jeenyuss> i'm an awful canadian.
NICKNAME> it's ballhockey, but close enough ;p
NICKNAME> so, I end up spending all night with her, the fact that she may be a huge druggy hits me as she gets high repeatedly but i brush it off
NICKNAME> (BRB 3 minutes, dog needs out)
NICKNAME> 1 min till popcorn done
NICKNAME> k
NICKNAME> so anyways
NICKNAME> we hang out all night, hit it off (again). I'm not a fan of drugs short of once awhile and both times i've seen her she's been a big druggy (this is called somewhat foreshadowing)
NICKNAME> she asks me what i'm doing friday and we make plans (this might get hazzy now, was a year ago)
Jeenyuss> i love literary devices
NICKNAME> and she says shes going to call thursday
NICKNAME> I kinda say ok, even though I hate talking on the phone for more than a minute
NICKNAME> She calls Thursday, and we talk for like 7 hours, all the way till 5 am (I worked at 6:30, it sucked hard)
NICKNAME> this is the single most amazing phone call I ever had
Jeenyuss> i thought you didn't like talking on the phone
NICKNAME> and I really started falling for her here
NICKNAME> I don't
NICKNAME> everything just clicked
NICKNAME> my ear actually hurt
Jeenyuss> was it bleeding
NICKNAME> it was bright red
NICKNAME> I had to alternate veery 30 min or so
Jeenyuss> with blood?
NICKNAME> yeah I guess
NICKNAME> so we double with Adam and Amanda on what can be called 'the first date' on the friday
NICKNAME> we do glow in the dark mini golf (I RULED!) and then saw Borat (IT RULED!)
NICKNAME> I drove her home (one town over) and we ended up sitting in my car talking for another two hours
NICKNAME> Thank god I drive a Le Sabre and it's more comfortable than my living room
NICKNAME> Cha-Ching $
NICKNAME> again nothing that big physically because were...you know...in her driveway
NICKNAME> she's 18 btw, and i was 22
NICKNAME> wait
NICKNAME> maybe she was 19
NICKNAME> younger than me, thats all thats important
NICKNAME> and lived at home (obviously)
NICKNAME> she wasn't 17, thats for sure
NICKNAME> so things are going really good
NICKNAME> I'm falling head over heels, heart on my sleeve for her
NICKNAME> and she does appear to be too good to be true
NICKNAME> only flaws so far are the drugs, and how many guys she's slept with
NICKNAME> cause whats the rule? add 7 from whatever they actually say
NICKNAME> or something like that
NICKNAME> no wait, the rule with 7 is half you age + 7 for the lowest you can date
Jeenyuss> i think the rule is if there's grass play ball, if not, play in the mud
NICKNAME> I forget what the rule is
NICKNAME> anyways, and this is the part where guys tend to start hating the story
NICKNAME> I pick her up saturday for just the two of us staying in at my place
NICKNAME> (I'm also living wiht my parents, but there out, so we are alone)
NICKNAME> here's the part you'll hate
NICKNAME> right after I made the plans, I was offered Platinum Leafs tickets
NICKNAME> (two of them)
NICKNAME> for that night's game, I think against Ottawa (which is huge)
Jeenyuss> wow
NICKNAME> she hates hockey, and doesn't want to go
NICKNAME> but says it's ok if I do
NICKNAME> and I don't
NICKNAME> I gave them away
NICKNAME> i know, i know, 200 dollar leaf tickets that i'll never see again ever, for a chick
NICKNAME> i'm a terrible human being, and a terrible leaf fan
NICKNAME> i know
Jeenyuss> vs the sens, dude
NICKNAME> who I knew for all of 6 or 7 days at this point
NICKNAME> I KNOW!
NICKNAME> I was called an idiot by many a person
Jeenyuss> it's not like it's fucking the leafs vs fucking the atlanta thrashers here
Jeenyuss> IT'S THE FUCKING SENS VS THE LEAFS
Jeenyuss> AND THEY'RE PLATINUM TICKETS
NICKNAME> Yep!
Jeenyuss> go on.
NICKNAME> So we're alone, and we fool around a bit, sober me (the much more charming me) manages to get her clothes off....all with my teeth
NICKNAME> (applause)
NICKNAME> nice perky boobs, all is right in the world
NICKNAME> I gave first, being the oh so gentleman that I am
NICKNAME> and then her phone rings (after that) and it's her mom saying "where the hell are you"
NICKNAME> ugh
NICKNAME> so I miss out when I take her home (it's like 3 am or something)
NICKNAME> but it's clear now this isn't just some fling, so i'll get my shot

[Jeenyuss]

NICKNAME> so, I call her on monday I think, and she's almost a different person
NICKNAME> she's now bitchy and short with me, the girl I talked to on the phone for 7 hours is gone
NICKNAME> now I have issue talking to her for 5 minutes
NICKNAME> as she talks about the stupid asians that work at her car dealership (I PG13'd that for you)
NICKNAME> I kinda brsuh it off (I BET SHES ON HER RAG!)
NICKNAME> and it ocntinues throughout the week
Jeenyuss> yeah women are on their rag at least 85% of the time, FUI
NICKNAME> I go see her on some day, im not sure which, Probably wednesday
NICKNAME> actually, yeah, it was wednesday
NICKNAME> So we hang out a bit, it's awkward and forced feeling, not fun.
NICKNAME> I eventually have to leave to go to hockey
NICKNAME> I'm at least 30 minutes from he rhouse when she calls my cell
NICKNAME> and starts some sort of weird guilt trip
NICKNAME> like "are we ok" and all sorts of weirdness
NICKNAME> I honestly feel that at this point I don't want to lose her, so i SKIP HOKCEY (huge, I never miss hockey) and go back to calm her down
NICKNAME> and all seems ok.
NICKNAME> she contineus the attitude the next few days
NICKNAME> like one day she gives me the line "i really want to see you tonight"
NICKNAME> and then I get there and she says "oh, we're going to go hang out with alison and amanda"
NICKNAME> which is it baby?
NICKNAME> So we go to Amanda house, awkwardness ensues (a couple of two years with a couple on shaky ground after 2 weeks, not good)
NICKNAME> She's very distant from me (we're all on one couch)
NICKNAME> and then she throws her feet up on me, and I kinda reassuringly squeeze them, because I have no idea what else to do
NICKNAME> anbd then later on shes all like "Why didn't you put your arm around me"
NICKNAME> ."uhhh, you're 4 feet away?"
NICKNAME> (Input)
NICKNAME> (you last spoke 5 min ago, I can tell, Reward: 200 points)
NICKNAME> (plus I have no idea how well i'm setting the story, it's been almost a year since I told it)
Jeenyuss> i am reading
NICKNAME> glorious
NICKNAME> HAVE I SUCKED YOU INTO MY TALE YET?
NICKNAME> or too much info?
Jeenyuss> i am sucked, yes
Jeenyuss> continue
NICKNAME> Glorious
Jeenyuss> have you gotten a blowjob by this point
NICKNAME> so she continues to act standoffish with a hint of immaturity
NICKNAME> Sadly no
NICKNAME> nothing of an substance
NICKNAME> because were never alone
Next elimination match is starting. Type ?go baseelim to play
NICKNAME> So
NICKNAME> she continues this stupidness
NICKNAME> and the next saturday is rolling around
NICKNAME> and we've been shaky for at least a week now, to the point where i'm slipping into "fuck her" mode (like, she can fuck off, who cares)
Jeenyuss> brain in the turning lane
NICKNAME> because she's become a pretty big bitch
NICKNAME> but also I think of the girl who was there for the first week
NICKNAME> who was fucking perfect
NICKNAME> so i'm willing to hang around a bit longer
NICKNAME> Now we had planned for two weeks to go to Adam's house to watch the leafs game
NICKNAME> and she had been all for it
NICKNAME> until the friday before (it was a sat game)
NICKNAME> where I get all this drama
NICKNAME> I get 6 text messages (full texts) in 3 minutes at work, and then a phone call
NICKNAME> I work construction, needless to say the entire site had gathered around to hear all this, laughing there asses off. a good 20 people
NICKNAME> she says she doesn't want to come
NICKNAME> and then she says i'm going even if you're not
NICKNAME> just bullshit
NICKNAME> i tell her i'm going, I said I would go, i'll go. If shes there great if not, whatever
NICKNAME> At this point in my mind she's not worth it anymore, unless she shows up on saturday and is fucking perfect again
NICKNAME> so she calls me when i'm on my way to adams
NICKNAME> (this is the begining of the end of the story)
NICKNAME> and tells me to "call when i'm in the driveway"
NICKNAME> To me that means that she's probably gonna meet me outside and break up with me or something
NICKNAME> so although not thrilled with the prospect, i'm not going to avoid it
NICKNAME> I pick up the pizza and pay for it (Despite having ZERO money while she has tons. I fucking hate paying for everything. Adam is a broke ass too)
NICKNAME> So I call when i'm in the driveway, expecting to get dumped and go home with my pizza (lose win situation, i get pizza either way)
NICKNAME> and she just says "oh ok, come on in"
NICKNAME> like huh, why did i have to call?
NICKNAME> I come in, and her and amanda have just discovered facebook, and are uploading photos from there phones while making a BFF facebook (i shit you not)
Jeenyuss> i bet she had whipped cream on her titties
NICKNAME> she basically ignores me
NICKNAME> so I end up watching the game with Adam, alone
NICKNAME> there gone for at least 2 1/2 - 3 hours
NICKNAME> so i have a few beers, nothing much though
NICKNAME> they finally come over, and after watching old school american gladiators, it seems like everything is ok
NICKNAME> i'm sitting on a chair, as is adam, while there both ont he couch
NICKNAME> they bust out a game called "the weed game" which i'm sure i'll be awesome at (i don't do drugs, never have never will, I do beer and thats about it)
Next elimination match is starting. Type ?go elim to play
NICKNAME> and she basically tells me the rules while I ignore them
NICKNAME> I'm just rolling and she's telling me what I have to do
NICKNAME> I got to act out a skit with things I found in the fridge
NICKNAME> and let me tell you, Hamlet with a kethcup packet and a small bit of butter could have gone nation
NICKNAME> She keeps passing me beers, and basically everytime I roll I get a "chug your drink" or something
NICKNAME> so in a very short time i'm getting shitfaced
NICKNAME> (THE BEGINING OF THE AMBUSH)
Jeenyuss> maybe the whipped cream was in her ass with a banana n shit
NICKNAME> So we play the game like 3 times, i'm sure she's cheating giving me all these drinking things (in hindsight) but i'm not looking, so I don't know
NICKNAME> so I get so drunk that afterwards I literally pass out in the chair not once, but twice
NICKNAME> she flat out has to support at least half my weight (not easy, i'm a big feller and shes small) and to carry me to bed
NICKNAME> I ask where i'm sleeping, and point to an empty couch and say thats fine, and she just keeps saying "no not there, just follow me" (she said it at least 4/5 times, when I was fine on the floor)
NICKNAME> so I get led into Adam's basement
NICKNAME> and threw a drapped flag is apparently our room
NICKNAME> with a little blow up bed, a tv, and some shelves
NICKNAME> I fall flat on my face as if I was shot on the bed
NICKNAME> and basically say "MMMkay, Night!"
NICKNAME> Clearly, I am not up for anything
NICKNAME> Apparently, she is
NICKNAME> she changes into like pjs, while facing the other way
NICKNAME> and then basically walks over and takes them off (THEN WHY PUT THEM ON?)
NICKNAME> and before I know it, because my brain is moving at the speed of a clam, she's got my pants off
NICKNAME> I'm sure I had some very witty jokes going throughout it like "Woah, why are my pants off?!"
NICKNAME> so she basically strips me to my boxers like i'm a two year old
NICKNAME> and says, in the least sexiest way possible "the condoms are in the drawer"
NICKNAME> Now, I don't know about you, but when a chick basically just offers herself up to me, I'm not a fan. I prefer a bit of a challenge
Jeenyuss> she probably should've said 'wrap your shit, mu'fucka' and slapped your tit
NICKNAME> like I have to earn it, ya know?
Jeenyuss> ok
NICKNAME> i take it your not one of those guys
Jeenyuss> i agree
Jeenyuss> but after you've been dating this girl for a while and she's been a bitch, pussy is pussy
NICKNAME> fantastic, so you understand
Jeenyuss> although, every situation is different
Jeenyuss> anyway go on
NICKNAME> this situation is i'm almost to drunk to stand, i've already passed out twice, and I want to sleep
NICKNAME> and although I appreciate the naked chick beside me, she's done nothing to make me want her
NICKNAME> short of you know, being naked
NICKNAME> so
5:Jeenyuss> money someone told me purple drank is grape soda and tylenol 3 with codiene

[Jeenyuss]

NICKNAME> in my drunken stupor my brain says "GO FOR IT! Whats the worst that could happen?"
5:delta> there are many versions
5:delta> you should use jolly ranchers
5:money> lol
5:money> there is no versions..
5:Jeenyuss> i need to make it using t3's
5:Jeenyuss> i don't have the sizzurp
5:money> there is only one lean
NICKNAME> so rather than just nailing her like she's a wooden log (boring) i start to fool around with her, like you know, it should be
NICKNAME> I eat her out, and she really did have a greta snatch
5:money> promethazine and codeine
5:Jeenyuss> i'm just going to put 4 t3's into a cup with some tuss, sprite, and jolly ranchers
NICKNAME> shaved (cha-ching)
NICKNAME> Oh wait
5:money> mix 2 oz with some sprite or mt dew
NICKNAME> BACKTRACKING
NICKNAME> i forgot something
NICKNAME> before she gets naked she turns on the tv
NICKNAME> so it's on this whole time
NICKNAME> and she turns it pretty loud
5:Jeenyuss> i've fuckin told you this a million times, money.
5:money> yea u cant get the real stuff in canada easy
5:Jeenyuss> i can?
NICKNAME> now thats not all together than odd, except that I can hear one room over ADAM AND AMANDA TURN THERE TV ON TOO
NICKNAME> and loud
NICKNAME> so we're apparently going to use TV's so we won't hear each other
NICKNAME> AWKARD
NICKNAME> or AWKWARD
NICKNAME> whichever is more weird
NICKNAME> so I eat her out
NICKNAME> and she decides she's going to return the favour
NICKNAME> And I am in full support of this
NICKNAME> Throughout my life, I seem to always get the girl who takes but never gives, and thats total bullshit. Heather has PROMISED me that she's a giver and enjoys giving
NICKNAME> thank fucking god
NICKNAME> so anyways
5:Jeenyuss> fuckin hate you money
NICKNAME> she's down there for all of 2 seconds
NICKNAME> when I feel it
NICKNAME> PAIN
NICKNAME> LOTS AND LOTS OF PAIn
Jeenyuss> ugh ugh teeth ugh ugh
NICKNAME> I'm talking full on teeth
NICKNAME> AND
Jeenyuss> WHAT THE FUCK
NICKNAME> a VERY VERY sharp tongue stud
NICKNAME> it's a dice, and I swear to you I could feel every side (oh thats a six, that side is only 4, please god let it stop)
NICKNAME> so shes only been down there for 5 seconds
Jeenyuss> one time you find yourself prayin for snake eyes
NICKNAME> and I want to curl into the fetal position
NICKNAME> it takes me 5 more seconds to come up with a plan to make her stop
NICKNAME> (very drunk remember)
NICKNAME> and in my drunken state, rather than saying "Owww"
NICKNAME> or "that hurts, please stop"
NICKNAME> OR "no teeth please"
NICKNAME> OR anything else that would you know, keep it going but in a fun way
NICKNAME> I basically rip her off and up to me (shes light)
NICKNAME> and I think I said "I need to kiss you right now"
NICKNAME> (think)
NICKNAME> this is my first mistake...actually it's like my tenth, but always correct them when they do it wrong
NICKNAME> so now my penis is flat out afraid of her
NICKNAME> it's whimpering like a scolded dog
NICKNAME> and my brain just keeps saying "think think think"
NICKNAME> I don't want to hurt her feelings by saying something like "Wow Heather, that was the worst blowjob ever"
NICKNAME> and because i'm drunk, I still want to get some
NICKNAME> but my penis needs a break
NICKNAME> so my backup plan that I come up with is to
NICKNAME> eat her out again
NICKNAME> Brilliant plan!
NICKNAME> Except, because i'm so awesome, she doesn't give me the desired time, and I arrive right back where I was without a plan
NICKNAME> Now, a smart plan would have been to say "you know what, I'm really drunk and really tired, how about we finish this later"
NICKNAME> or something equally as tactful
4:Gen> fuck midterm week
Jeenyuss> i gotta go to a show soon
4:Gen> and fuck fla choking
4:Gen> jesus fuck everyone
NICKNAME> it's almost done
Jeenyuss> ok
NICKNAME> i'll ffw'd quick
NICKNAME> Basically, she decides to try again, and the same horrible uglyness ensues, and my penis flat out runs away. I pull her off again, and rather than explain why i've now stopped her twice
NICKNAME> I basically do nothing
NICKNAME> She takes this as a que to go get the condom
NICKNAME> and then knowing my penis will in no way, shape, or form, ever want to go near her again
NICKNAME> She basically says 'fuck me'
NICKNAME> and I basically say 'no
NICKNAME> AWKWARD
Jeenyuss> ahahahahah
NICKNAME> so she ends up going to sleep, while spongebob squarepants plays on tv (because that makes me hot)
NICKNAME> now
NICKNAME> I'm styill hammered
NICKNAME> and now I can't sleep
NICKNAME> because all I can think of is how my penis has just let me down
NICKNAME> I'm to drunk to realise that she's almost bit it off, TWICE
NICKNAME> all I can seem to focus on now is that she wanted to nail me, and in a million years I wouldn't have been able too
4:Gen> nick tell me your story to cheer me up
4:Jeenyuss> one sec he's finishing telling me
NICKNAME> so it literally keeps me up, all night, and I even ponder making a move in the morning
4:NICKNAME> SHHHH
4:Jeenyuss> i mean not telling me
:gen:it's ok i'll post the log on the forums, shh
NICKNAME> but I don't, because now i'm afraid of this 100lb chick
NICKNAME> crushing my pride
(Gen)>lolz
NICKNAME> Also fun, I thought (while drunk) oh, I'll just nail her with my morning wood
NICKNAME> And I won't let her face go anywhere near my little fellah
NICKNAME> But, probably because I was so drunk, or because I didn't really sleep, No morning wood
NICKNAME> and thus endeth my ideas
NICKNAME> I wake up the next morning, still buzzed, very hung over and very ashamed (my mind doesn't click into the fact that shes a vampire who tried to drink the blood from my penis until days later)
NICKNAME> I even get the joy of having to DRIVE HER THE FUCK HOME
Next elimination match is starting. Type ?go elim to play
NICKNAME> I basically ignore her, playing it off like i'm in much worse shape than I am
NICKNAME> drop her off
NICKNAME> and decided to never ever speak of this moment, or too her again
NICKNAME> But fate, fate is a funny one my friend
4h> where the fuck is cent
4:Gen> protesting more things that nobody except retards care about
Jeenyuss> why is fate funny
NICKNAME> For later on the next week, after not talking to me for at least 6 days (HELLO SIGNAL) she shows up and sits down next to me before I even see her coming
NICKNAME> (at hockey)
NICKNAME> and my friends all know by now
NICKNAME> and there texting each other baout it, and laughing, because were all at the same big table
NICKNAME> and it's the single most awkward meal of my life
NICKNAME> I went from the DD to drunk and depressed in about 10 minutes
NICKNAME> SO, she leaves, after some uglyness between her and my buddy Luke when he said out loud something like 'he'd take a bullet for me and this bitch wouldn't do shit'
NICKNAME> or something
NICKNAME> anyways
NICKNAME> So I assume she's gone
NICKNAME> Two weeks pass
NICKNAME> my ego, still damaged beyond repair, is uh...damaged
NICKNAME> when poof, she calls
NICKNAME> and asks me what i'm doing for valentines day (a few days away)
NICKNAME> i basically brsuh her off quickly, and say i'll call her back
Jeenyuss> are we close to the ending
NICKNAME> and a several day long thought of nailing her to win my mojo back comes to me
NICKNAME> (1 minute left0
Jeenyuss> ok go
NICKNAME> but in the end, I decided shes using me to try to get V-Day shit (and her birthday is the week after) so I let her fly away, but not before she decides to tell Adam and Amanda that I apparently couldn't get it up (funny, what was that in your mouth.
NICKNAME> ... that you almost bit off, TWICE)
NICKNAME> and Adam is a compullsive liar, and basically tells anybody with ears
NICKNAME> some of whom believe him
NICKNAME> and yeah
NICKNAME> thats my story in a nutshell
Jeenyuss> you should've fucked him in the ass to prove him otherwise
NICKNAME> She planned it (nailing me) all along
NICKNAME> because she had a bed and condoms waiting, and purposelly fed me tons of booze all night
NICKNAME> It was an AMBUSH
Jeenyuss> i have to go good bye nn
NICKNAME> a Teeth filled Ambush, we lost a lot of good men
NICKNAME> never speak of this again
NICKNAME> EVER

sorry nick, it had to be done.

[Scurvy]

finally.
thank you.
and


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[HateTheFake]

This thread made interesting by nickname and his limp bleeding cock

[Pandagirl!]

Post(s) of the year

[Mantra-Slider]

ok this is a long read and Im not finished yet but I like this already:

Jeenyuss> i don't know how to skate

edit: why didnt you tell her she was doing it wrong nn

[DetroitCity]

Not really a fan of them.. I think they are pritty trashy and not needed.

[Vatican Assassin]

bitches who suck dick right get braces

[Bioture]

I've had one friend from high school who got a tongue ring. After making fun of him and calling him "cock-sucker" for 8 hours, he's no longer a friend.

So yeah get a tongue ring if you want to lose all your friends.

[Liquid Blue]

About time you suckers heard his story, I didn't log it when he told me so I wouldn't have been able to present it in full glory

[the_paul]

Jeeny for posts of the year.

[Soul Survivor]

I had a Tounge Ring. Ex's I have dated had tounge rings. It's nothing special. Learn how to use your cock. Learn how to eat pussy. Sexually It does nothing unless you eat a couple pieces of ice before you go the oral route. End of story newbie.

[Liquid Blue]

where is this clitoris

I've never seen it before oh great one, teach me

[HateTheFake]

where is this clitoris

I've never seen it before oh great one, teach me

LOL thats like the blind leading the blind.