hypothetical spaceship situation

[Jeenyuss]

trench wars is blowing up. the core reactor is going to explode because too much radon is in its system or something. there's something wrong with the radon detector. and it's going to explode and shit. you can only save 5 pilots from the forthcoming disaster whos it gonna be?

1 d1st0rt - he's probably going to be able to do most things like trust his instincts and repair ship problems and make nintendos for us to have fun with and never give up and bring you blankets and hot cocao if you're cold.
2 royst - procreation. the guy's got the genes of a roman god, michael jordan, and el ultimo matador del barcelona rolled into one. hell, i'd have his kids if i weren't so deadset on saving myself for andre 3000.
3 stark - who else is gonna write a song about what happens to us in outerspace?
4 musashi - like ash from alien
5 ilyaz - don't wanna be racist

[curse]

Cres - gr8test influence on lyfe.

Zidane- #1 butt buddy

Rendered - SHU SHU G

doc flabby - gonan need him 2 make tw again

drake - gonna help doc make new tw again

[phata$$]

1) Royst - For his leadership, inhuman strength and sex appeal.
2) Jeenyuss - Comedic presence.
3) fit of rage - Brains. The guy is an actual fucking rocket scientist.
4) necromotic - Asian. He can probably build the ships. Probably add NOS and decals.
5) JAMAL - Wild card.

I would also like to bring project_dragon for all 5 of the above reasons.

[Jason]

none of your lists include a female

how are you going to carry on the human race?

[kthx]

With those lists maybe they shouldn't be anyways.

[phata$$]

none of your lists include a female

how are you going to carry on the human race?

Girls don't play Trench Wars silly.

[phata$$]

I'll be packing plenty of Fleshlights, too. I purchased a crate in the event of a failed radon detector.

[Epinephrine]

5 ilyaz - don't wanna be racist

Thought he was white, posing as a black guy.

[Cornelius]

1 - Kitty - to repopulate
2 - Pandagirl! - to repopulate
3 - Sandrine - to repopulate
4 - Audrey - to repopulate
5 - Mega Newbie (me) - Muahahahahhahaha...

[Xog]

Ephemeral - The most down-to-earth person in outerspace that I've ever conversed with.
Brookus - Who else is going to yell at the sharks in time of need?
menomena - I'd never live with myself if I never got to play Lasertag with him again.
Jason - The only person here I'd actually share my drugs with.
404 Not Found - Gonna need a wide variety of music.

[Jason]

i can't pick just 5

too much love for too many people!

i'm seriously struggling with a list, though

[Jerome Scuggs]

pavement - cuz bros before hoes
t0ne - because someone's gotta say it was the government or the jews who did it
zeus - because anyone with a british accent in space always has some sort of leadership or technical skills
kthx - because we all need some REPUBLICAN SPACE RANGERS

[Jason]

that's only 4

why are hippies so bad at math?

(i'm bad at it, too)

[kthx]

he must be a democrat space ranger.

[Jerome Scuggs]

duh the 5th spot goes to whoever has the most booze or drugs at the time of this radon overload