Trench Wars Recipe Collection

[THE PUSHER]

Food = Good. Need I say more? For those who have yet to be enlightened, here are a few of my recipes posted from the early days of this forum. As well as some tasty new additions. Feel free to add your own recipes, try new shit with mine, or just go to McDonald's and have a fucking cheeseburger.

First let us start with a long overdue recipe for Push's Crazy Mother Fuckin Chili. As requested by ConcreteSchlrrrrd.

Push's Crazy Mother Fuckin Chili

Ingredients

3 pounds of Ground Beef/Chuck
4 - TBSP Chopped Garlic
2 - 24 oz cans Diced Tomato
2 - 24 oz cans Tomato Sauce
1 - 8oz Bottle Chili Sauce (spicy)
6 - TBSP Tabasco Sauce
1 - Bottle Spicy Bloody Mary Mix (avail at most grocery stores)
1 - 24 oz can Crushed Tomato
2 - large Yellow Onions - diced
6 - Jalapeno Peppers - diced with no seeds
1 - 8 oz can Chipolte Peppers (in sauce)
2 - Cups Chopped Celery
2 - Sweet Red Peppers - chopped
2 - Green Peppers - chopped
1 - Yellow Pepper - chopped
2 - Habanero Peppers
6 - TBSP Chili Powder
4 - TBSP Paprika
5 - TBSP Ground Cumin
2 - TBSP Ground Cayenne Pepper
3 - TBSP Crushed Red Pepper Flakes
2 - TBSP Oregano
2 - TBSP Salt
1 - TBSP White Pepper

Optional Ingredients
Flank steak can be used instead of ground beef. Just make sure to marinate the steak in vegetable oil, lemon juice, cilantro, and garlic overnight. You can also add kidney beans if that's you're thing.

Cooking Instructions

Add some olive oil to a pan and brown off the ground beef, making sure to keep the beef in small pieces. Drain all the grease and set aside. Next, take a large stock pot and add two tablespoons of oilve oil to it over medium-high heat. Add the garlic and simmer for 30 seconds. Next add jalapeno, red pepper, yellow pepper, green pepper, onion, and celery and cook until the vegetables are tender (about 4 minutes). Next chop up the chipolte peppers and add them to the vegetables (including the sauce from the can) and simmer. Add the ground beef and remaining ingredients EXCEPT THE HABANERO, and stir until well combined.

The final step is adding the habanero peppers. This can be done many ways and should only be done to coincide with your preferences and tolerance for spicy foods. The safest way is to leave the habanero whole and place it in a teaball. The teaball can be added to the chili and removed once the desired spiciness has been achieved. You can chop the habanero as well, and place inside the teaball. For the truly daring, mince the habanero (wear gloves and don't touch your dick without thoroughly washing your hands) and throw it all into the chili and leave it.

This chili should simmer over low heat on your stove for 2-3 hours until it thickens, stir every 20-25 minutes.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Push's very own Bourbon BBQ Sauce!

How about some mashed taters to go with your BBQ?

10# Baby Red Potatoes (Leave the skin on!)
1 Cup Heavy Cream or Half-n-Half
2 TBSP Fresh Chopped Horseradish
2 TBSP Fresh Chopped Garlic
1/2 Stick Butter or Margarine
1 TSP Salt
2 TSP Black Pepper
2 TBSP Chopped Green Onions

Cook the potatoes in boiling water until they are tender (use a fork to test, the potato should break apart). Drain the water and add the remaining ingredients. Mash the potatoes by hand or using a hand mixer on low speed. Serve and enjoy!


Mr. Spam> but push, what if I dont like BBQ?

Never fear Spam! Heres a quick recipe for some great Marinara!

2 24 oz Cans of Crushed Tomatoes
3 TBSP Fresh Chopped Garlic
6 Julienne Chopped Basil Leaves
1 TBSP Dried Oregano
1 TBSP Dried Parsley
1 TBSP Black Pepper
2 TSP Salt
1 TBSP Soy Sauce
2 TBSP Honey

In a sauce pot, heat 2 tablespoons of Olive Oil over medium heat. When oil is warm add the garlic and cook for one minute. Add the basil and spices, mix and simmer 2 minutes. Add the tomatoes, soy sauce, and honey, simmer on low heat for 30 minutes stirring frequently. Serve over cooked pasta with fresh parmesan cheese.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Roasted and Stuffed Poblano Peppers

4 Poblano Peppers (Large)
8 oz Smoked Chicken or Duck
4 Cups Cooked Jasmine Rice
2 Cups Shredded Pepper Cheese
1 Cup Diced Roma Tomato
1 Sweet Red Pepper Diced
1/2 Cup Fresh Chopped Cilantro

Roast the Poblano peppers over an open flame (you can use a grill or your gas range) until the skin begins to blister and peel lightly. Remove from the flame and rinse under cold water to peel away the outer skin. Cut the top off of the pepper and remove the seeds and membrane from the inside. In a mixing bowl, combine the Chicken or Duck, Rice, Pepper Cheese, Dice Tomato, Diced Red Pepper, and Cilantro and mix well by hand. Stuff each of the peppers with an equal amount of the mixture, and bake them in the oven at 250 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until hot.

The Sauce

1 24 oz Can of Crushed Tomatoes
1/2 Thinly Sliced Red Onion
2 TBSP Fresh Chopped Garlic
2 TBSP Apple Juice
2 TBSP Honey

In a sauce pan add 1 oz of olive oil over medium heat until warm. Add the garlic and onions, simmer for 2 minutes or until the onions begin to turn clear. Add the tomatoes, apple juice, and honey. Simmer over low heat for 30 minutes stirring frequently. Serve over the stuffed peppers.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Triple Berry Puffed Pancakes

2 Cups Buttermilk (add more as required for proper consistency)
2 Eggs, not beaten
1 Tablespoon Canola oil or 1 tablespoon melted butter
1-1/4 Cups unbleached flour
1-1/2 Teaspoons of baking powder
1 Teaspoon baking soda
1 Teaspoon sugar
1/4 Teaspoon salt
1/2 Cup Fresh Blueberries
1/2 Cup Fresh Strawberries
1/2 Cup Fresh Raspberries or Blackberries

Stir together butter milk, eggs, and oil or butter. Sift together flour baking powder, baking soda, sugar and salt. Combine all ingredients. Stir gently with a wire whisk. Pre heat your oven to 400 degrees. Using an 8" teflon or other non-stick coating pan, coat the inside of the pan with melted butter. Add 8 oz of the batter and sprinkle the fruit into the batter as desired. Put pan into oven and bake until the top is golden brown. FLip the pancake over inside the pan and bake until finished (use a toothpick to poke the center, if the pick is dry when you remove the cake is done). Serve with powdered sugar or maple syrup.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Fresh Fruit Whipped Cream

8 oz Heavy Whipping Cream
2 Strawberries
1 Banana
1/4 Cup Fresh Raspberries
4 TBSP Powdered Sugar

Add all ingredients together in a blender. Mix on med-high until thick. Serve over ice cream or fresh fruit salad.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Pusher's La-La-La-La-Lasagna

Ingredients

Sauce
1/4 cup olive oil
1 lb. ground lean beef
1 cup chopped onion
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
2 6-oz. cans tomato sauce
1/2 to 1 can crushed tomatoes
2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. dried basil
1/2 tsp. oregano, dried
1/4 tsp. black pepper
1/2 tsp. bay leaves


Other
1 cup black olives (optional)
8 oz. lasagna
1/2 pd mozzarella cheese
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese


Heat a sauce pan on medium heat and add olive oil, garlic, onions, and ground beef. Cook until onions are clear and drain the grease. Add tomatoes and spices to the beef and simmer on low for one hour. Remove the bay leaves after cooking. In a separate pot, boil water and cook the lasagna noodles. Do not over cook the noodles, make sure they are firm. In a 7" x 12" x 4" pan, grease the sides lightly with oil or shortening and pour 1/4 of the sauce in the pan. Add a layer of noodles, then more sauce, repeat until the top layer is sauce and sprinkle on the parmesan cheese. Bake in preheated oven at 350 degrees for 30 - 40 minutes. Serves 5-6 people.

Variations. Substitute red bell peppers, eggplant, and artichokes for the beef. Add 2 TBSP of balsamic vinegar to the sauce. Rest stays the same.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Smoked Chicken Tortilla Soup

1 gallon water
1/2 gallon Heavy Cream
4 chicken bullion cubes or 2 TBSP chicken base
1 pound Smoked Chicken
1 cup diced white or yellow onion
1 diced jalapeno no seeds
1 diced green pepper
1/2 lb butter
3/4 cup flour
3 cups shredded cheddar cheese
2 TBSP ground cumin
1 TBSP salt
1 TBSP white pepper
1 TBSP paprika
1 TBSP chili powder
4 6 inch fresh corn tortillas (diced into small pieces)
2 cups milk

Add water, spices, onions, jalapeno, green pepper, and chicken bullion/base to a stock pot over medium heat. In separate pot melt butter and add flour to make roux, remove from heat. When soup begins to lightly boil add the smoked chicken (make sure chicken is in small pieces). Add the cream and bring up the temperature again, do not boil. Cook for 15 minutes, lower heat and add the roux, mixing until roux is incorporated into the soup. Add the cheddar cheese and tortilla pieces to soup and mix until they are blended into the soup. Add milk and stir, cook for additional 15-20 minutes. Serve with a dollop of sour cream of tortilla chips on top.

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Pusher's Chicken Alfredo

1 pound Diced Chicken Breast
1 pound Fettucine Noodles (cooked)
1/2 stick of unsalted or regular butter
2 TBSP Chopped fresh garlic
1/2 cup sundried tomatoes (optional)
1 cup chopped broccoli
1 cup sliced mushrooms
1 cup grated parmesan cheese
3 cups Heavy Cream or creme fresch
2 tsp salt
1 tsp white pepper
1 tsp basil
1 tsp oregano

In a medium sauce pot over medium flame, add the butter and melt. Once melted add the garlic until the garlic starts to cook. Add the chicken and sautee for 3 minutes stirring frequently. Next add the vegetables and spices and sautee until veggies are tender. Next add the heavy cream and bring all ingredients to a light boil and reduce lightly. Next add the parmesan cheese over low flame and stir until the sauce thickens a bit. Finally add the noodles, cook for an additional two minutes and serve.

[THE PUSHER]

From the Kitchen of THE PUSHER

Pusher's Crab Dip

INGREDIENTS:

1 can of Snow Crab (drained and whole pieces removed)
1 Pound of Soft Cream Cheese
1 8 oz bottle of Heinz 57 Chili Sauce
2 TBSP Worcesteshire Sauce
1 TBSP Granulated Garlic
2 TSP Salt
2 TSP Black Pepper
2 TBSP Dried Chopped Parsley

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Mix the cream cheese, spices, worcesteshire sauce together in a large bowl until incorporated. Spread the mix evenly on a large platter, covering all but 1/2" of the edge of the plate. Spread the Chili sauce evenly over the cream cheese mix, then cover evenly with the drained crab meat. Sprinkle the parsley over the top to finish. Serve with wheat thins or other tasty cracker. Keep refrigerated when not serving.

[Exotic]

im getting hungry,who wants some perogies ?

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Pusher's Dirty Rice

1/2 Cup of bacon grease
1 - pound Diced Ham
3 - Cups Chopped Andouille Sausage
2 - Cups Chopped Fresh Shrimp
2 - TBSP Chopped Garlic
1/2 Cup White Wine
4 - Cups Diced Yellow Onion
4 - Cups Chopped Green Pepper
2 - Jalapenos (diced - no seeds)
2 - Cups chopped Okra
8 - Cups Canned Diced Tomato
3 - Cups Chicken Stock (water and chicken boullion/base)
3 - Cups Uncooked Enriched Rice
2 - TBSP Chopped Parsley
1 - TBSP Thyme
2 - TSP Ground Cayenne Pepper
1 - TBSP Black Pepper (ground or cracked)

For this recipe you will need to use a stock pot that can be placed into your oven. This recipe requires a stove top and oven cooking procedure.

Place a stock pot over med-high heat and add the bacon grease. Once the bacon grease is warm, add the sausage and ham and cook for about four minutes. Next add the shrimp, garlic, and white wine and simmer for 2 minutes. Next add the diced tomatoes, onions, peppers, and okra and simmer until the vegetables are tender. Add the remaining ingredients and mix well and remove from the stove. Next, cover the pan tightly with aluminum foil and place in a preheated oven at 275 degrees. Cook for 25 minutes and fluff with a fork before serving.

[syzygy]

i want perogies! with cheese? and sauteed onions on the side?

[THE PUSHER]

From the kitchen of THE PUSHER

Skin-on Garlic Ranch Mashed Potatoes

5 pounds A or B size Red Potato (leave skin on)
2 - TBSP Chopped Garlic
1 - TBSP Horseradish (prepared or fresh)
1 - TBSP Salt
1 - TBSP Black Pepper (ground)
1 - TBSP Oregano
1 1/2 Cup Ranch Dressing

Boil the potatoes until they are tender and mashable. Drain the water and add all ingredients together. Using a wire whisk or potato masher, mash the potatoes up and eat until you pass out.

Giving credit where credit is due.. this recipe was inspired by bloodzombie.

[Rudy]

What good are all these recipes to us? Straight guys can't cook. :P

[sTuPiD-gErBiL]

From the liquor cabinet of sTuPiD-gErBiL

Grape Candy (16 oz. version):
8 oz. Walmart brand grape soda
5 oz. Walmart brand orange soda
3 oz. Taaka vodka

Flavor can best be described as similar to grape-flavored Nerds™ candy