Late at night ...

[TelC@t]

Bloodzombie had been a chief exective for Seillap Corporation's marketing department for some years when he decided that he was sick of the stress and quit his job. He bought 50 acres of land in the middle of Nowhere, Esab Mile. His place was so isolated that the postman came only once a week and he went to the grocery store only once a month.

After six months of near total isolation, he hears a knock on the door. He opens the door and a pale skinned Esab Miler is standing there. He says, "Names Magi Koz...your neighbor from four miles over the ridge. Having a party Saturday...thought you'd like to come."

"Great," replies bz. "After six months of living like this I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thanks for inviting me."

As Magi Koz is leaving, he stops. "Gotta warn you, though, there's gonna be some drinkin'." "Not a problem. After 3 years in Seillap, I can drink with the best of them."

Again, as he starts to leave, Mai Koz stops. "More 'n likely gonna be some fightin', too." Tough crowd, bz thinks to himself. "Well, I get along with people. Don't worry, I'll be there. Thanks again."

Once again, Magi Koz turns from the door, "I've seen some wild sex at these parties, too." "Now that is not a problem," bloodzombie says. "I've been up here all alone for six long months. I'll definitely be there.

By the way, what should I wear?"

Magi Koz stops in the doorway one last time and says... "Whatever you want. Just gonna be the 2 of us there."

[TelC@t]

ConcreteSchlyrd and Goddess who have never met in real life before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.
After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, Goddess the top bunk, ConcreteSchlyrd on the lower.

In the middle of the night Goddess leans over, wakes Conc and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket."

ConcreteSchlyrd leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, "I've got a better idea... just for tonight, let's pretend we're married."

Goddess thinks for a moment. "Why not," she giggles.

"Great," he replies, "Get your own damn blanket!"

[Dameon Angell]

bahahahahahahah, lmfao. good stuff.

[TelC@t]

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are a 16 yo kid driver and 4 old people -- one in the front seat and three in the back - eyes wide and white as ghosts.

"Your grandparents, uh?" the officier asks the driver acknowledgingly.

The driver nods.

"You licence?"

The driver hands the licence to him.

"Dimboy", the police officer reads out the name on the licence.

The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"

"Well" the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit?" Dimboy asks. "No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly... Twenty-Two miles an hour!" Dim says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to him that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. A bit embarrassed, Dimboy grins and thanks the officer for pointing out his error.

"But before I let you go, I have to ask... Is everyone in this car ok? Your granparents seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time." the officer asks.

"Oh, they'll be alright in a minute officer. We just got off Route 119."

[Mr. Peanuts]

and the funny thing is, that dimboy managed to drive to america

[TelC@t]

TelCat, Troll King and sleepy weasel are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night TelCat wakes the other two up. "Hey guys, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce." Troll King says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth". Sleepy Weasel continues "and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."

TelCat replies: "You guys are idiots, somebody stole our tent!"

[TelC@t]

Eeks: "Where are you from?"

Jason: "I come from a place where we do not end our sentences with prepositions."

Eeks: "OK - where are you from, jackass?"

[ZeUs!!]

You didn't just make all of those up did you?

[eehh]

no, she didnt zeus. i have read the tent-joke before. it have been in a competition for the best joke ever.. with sherlock holmes and his assistant, whatever his name was again.

telcat==copycat

[Troll King]

The point wasn't to tell us jokes that we may or may not have heard before, but to put people we know into them. If your only reaction is that the jokes are old, then you've missed the point.

[Dameon Angell]

hahahahhahahhahahaha the tent joke r0x0rz.

[Goddess]

Lololol Telly that was cute ty for the good laugh :P

[MaGi kOz]

why do i got to be the one to invite bz to be raped?

[Mr. Peanuts]

what's goddess doing being active again?

[TelC@t]

One night Pearl Jam rolls over in bed and gives his girlfriend, material Girl a big grin.
Material Girl says, ''Not tonight honey, I have a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay clean and fresh.''
Pearl Jam feeling rejected rolls over and tries to go to sleep.
In a few minutes he rolls back over and asks her, ''Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow?''