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I was sitting at a Tim Horton's tonight, just jotting stuff into my notebook as I often do, when I had an idea. I don't know where to go with this, and thought "why not post what I've got and see what people think?". Usually I'd give this to one of my friends to look at, but it's late and I wanted some input before I lose this groove. Have a read.
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“What’s that you’re working on?” she asked him.
“Hmm? Uh, you mean this?” Daniel stammered, looking up from the
pencil-scratched notebook he cradled in his hands.
“Yeah, that. Can I see?”
Before he could answer, the spiral-bound notebook was pulled from
his hands. Natural instinct raised his right hand to grab it back, but inborn
clumsiness only made him drop his pencil in the sudden motion. A mild
protest died on his lips and he submitted to the woman whose eyes
now scanned his sketchy handwriting. Instead, he reached for his coffee,
hoping that its warmth would sooth his nerves.
“It’s just something I’ve been working on,” he explained as the bitter coffee
left its signature after-taste in his mouth.
She mumbled a reply, her light blue eyes continuing their movement across
the page. “What’s this word?”
“Hmm? Oh, um…” He leaned over to look at the page. “’Desert’. Sorry, my
e’s and my c’s look alike.” When he had leaned over, he caught a brief hint of
her scent, a combination of lilac and strawberries.
As her eyes continued their downward trail down the page, Daniel looked her
over briefly. Her dark blond hair flowed evenly from the part above her left
eyebrow with a few strands curving with her pale forehead. Her lightly
glossed lips parted slightly as she slowly tapped her left thumbnail against
her lower lip, a sign of a former nail-biter. The other fingers of her
raised fist pulled tightly on the cuff of her sweatshirt, stretching the sleeve at
the elbow. Tight black pants shaped her calves as her ankles lay crossed
above a pair of white sneakers.
Her lips curled into a slight smile as she gave a small chuckle.
“’Made the mistake of dying a couple of decades too soon’?” Daniel quoted from
memory.
She nodded in reply and shifted her hair over and behind her ears.
“Good,” he thought. “She’s near the end.”
At last, her eyes reached the end of the page. She glanced briefly at a
paragraph near the top before meeting Daniel’s expectant glance.
“Looks interesting so far. Is this going to be a short story, or a novel?”
“I… hadn’t really figured that out yet. I just had a general idea and started
writing before I forget it. I don’t know where I’ll go with it next.” He paused
apologetically, “it’s only a rough draft, an introduction to lay some
groundwork.”
“Oh, I know. I only asked because it sounds like an intro. You’re providing a
lot of background right away and it looks like you’re setting up some
subtexts.”
“Right. Um. Do you mind if I ask you something?”
“Shoot.”
“Do I know you?”
________________________________
“What’s that you’re working on?” she asked him.
“Hmm? Uh, you mean this?” Daniel stammered, looking up from the
pencil-scratched notebook he cradled in his hands.
“Yeah, that. Can I see?”
Before he could answer, the spiral-bound notebook was pulled from
his hands. Natural instinct raised his right hand to grab it back, but inborn
clumsiness only made him drop his pencil in the sudden motion. A mild
protest died on his lips and he submitted to the woman whose eyes
now scanned his sketchy handwriting. Instead, he reached for his coffee,
hoping that its warmth would sooth his nerves.
“It’s just something I’ve been working on,” he explained as the bitter coffee
left its signature after-taste in his mouth.
She mumbled a reply, her light blue eyes continuing their movement across
the page. “What’s this word?”
“Hmm? Oh, um…” He leaned over to look at the page. “’Desert’. Sorry, my
e’s and my c’s look alike.” When he had leaned over, he caught a brief hint of
her scent, a combination of lilac and strawberries.
As her eyes continued their downward trail down the page, Daniel looked her
over briefly. Her dark blond hair flowed evenly from the part above her left
eyebrow with a few strands curving with her pale forehead. Her lightly
glossed lips parted slightly as she slowly tapped her left thumbnail against
her lower lip, a sign of a former nail-biter. The other fingers of her
raised fist pulled tightly on the cuff of her sweatshirt, stretching the sleeve at
the elbow. Tight black pants shaped her calves as her ankles lay crossed
above a pair of white sneakers.
Her lips curled into a slight smile as she gave a small chuckle.
“’Made the mistake of dying a couple of decades too soon’?” Daniel quoted from
memory.
She nodded in reply and shifted her hair over and behind her ears.
“Good,” he thought. “She’s near the end.”
At last, her eyes reached the end of the page. She glanced briefly at a
paragraph near the top before meeting Daniel’s expectant glance.
“Looks interesting so far. Is this going to be a short story, or a novel?”
“I… hadn’t really figured that out yet. I just had a general idea and started
writing before I forget it. I don’t know where I’ll go with it next.” He paused
apologetically, “it’s only a rough draft, an introduction to lay some
groundwork.”
“Oh, I know. I only asked because it sounds like an intro. You’re providing a
lot of background right away and it looks like you’re setting up some
subtexts.”
“Right. Um. Do you mind if I ask you something?”
“Shoot.”
“Do I know you?”
.
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