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by Jerome and ZeUs!!. This post came about from a PM we were sending in July and we never got round to posting it, someone else can think up some more questions and finish it off
1. So someone asks you to help him move a shelf. You:
a) Help him, and then refer him to the nearest Shelf-moving service- Rodge_Rabbit
b) Shelves are a political tool for micheal moore's new groundbreaking and 100% true film: "Shelving Democracy" (ps america sucks) - Anduril.
c) Comment on how shelves are dumb, why dont you just leave your shit on the floor. - Jerome
d) "One time i got wasted and set a shelf on fire." - ZeUs!!
e) The bourgeoisie cannot exist without constantly revolutionizing the instruments of production, and thereby the relations of production, and with them the whole relations of society. Conservation of the old modes of production in unaltered form, was, on the contrary, the first condition of existence for all earlier industrial classes. Constant revolutionizing of production, uninterrupted disturbance of all social conditions, everlasting uncertainty and agitation distinguish the bourgeois epoch from all earlier ones. All fixed, fast frozen relations, with their train of ancient and venerable prejudices and opinions, are swept away, all new-formed ones become antiquated before they can ossify. All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses his real condition of life and his relations with his kind. Oh, sure, let me help you grab that shelf. - Troll King
f) Pick up the shelf, then start talking about how the shelf doesnt actually care, that we exist independent of the shelf and it does not matter if we move it. - Sarien
g) Shelves are for fags. Only nancyboys need help, anyway. - Ruby
h) "Well Mr. Poppy McChesterton, one time I rode a karma horse. While naked. Asleep. Phrase." - Pearl Jam
i) LOL I had a shelf once. - Lucon
j) LOL - Ivan
k) Godamnit move the shelf yourself, do I look like a fucking shelf mover? Shit damn fuck. - Wadi
l) ^_^ I have 2000 shelves, all brand new and better than yours. 3K USAGE! -Telcat
m) Hey guys I'm screwing a fat chick right now they rule but I don't like chicken. - IlyaZ
n) Hey guys I'm screwing a fat chick right now they rule but I don't like chicken lz0lz0lz - Exotic
o) You're so dumb, I want to- oh, wait, sure! I'd love to! - Awesome
p) Hmm, me carry a ...black... shelf? Are you trying to insinuate something? - foobarz
q) THIS SHELF WILL AID OUR BRETHREN IN THE LIBERATION OF AFRIKAA ZION. - Sudden
r) Here, let me help you. Oh, and I rule- Seriously. I worship myself at night- If I was a dildo, I would fuck myself. - Divine Rides
s) This shelf was designed with only the simple in mind. We can add a cupholder there, vector the wood sculpture to the left, and voila! - Jason
t) LOL that shelf sux my shelves are better, check em out. - IceStorm
2. Your car breaks down on the motorway, you're driving past and you reckognise the hapless victim as a fellow forum user, do you:
a) Fix his car, no, buy him a whole new car and give him enough petrol money for the next 12 months -Rodge
b) Piss him off even more -Anduril
c) Blame it on Michael Moore and proceed to flick your long floppy hair in a nonchelant and seductive manner -Jerome
d) Swear a lot, say something British and run off giggling -ZeUs!!
e) Give the most logical, sensible and boring explanation about how you failed to look after your car properly and how to fix it efficiently -Troll King
f) Stop and give a lecture on how we are all slaves to the capitalist system and we should rise up and break from these social shackles that tie down and do dick all about the car -Sarien
g) Pull your car to a screeching halt, jump out and run across the remaining lanes of the motorway shouting "DONT WORRY GUYS IM CISCO CERTIFIED GET OUT OF THE WAY HEY YOU IN THE BLUE FIESTA I FUCKED YOUR GIRLFRIEND IVE HAD BETTER LOLOLOLHAHAHAHAROFLEATSHITDIEKTNX" -Ruby
h) Put on your Brian May wig, break out your rock axe and bust out the cheesiest guitar solo while you wait for someone to actually stop and help -Pearl Jam
i) <Post count filler> -Lucon
j) LOL -Ivan
k) Sort your fucking car out, warned and moved to Useless Crap fuckface -Wadi
l) stop and then talk down to the victim in a derogatory manner "You're so stupid everyone knows how to wire a car I've got three degrees in professional car wiring, car wiring for professionals and wiring a car professionally AND I'VE GOT 5K USAGE YOU'RE SO DUMB" -Telcat
m) "Tim tang didn't make it on the basketball team, he was really upset" -IlyaZ
n) "Tim tang didn't make it on the basketball team, he was really upset ROFL LOL" -Exotic (thus explaining our ctrl+v joke in Jeansi's sig)
o) Continue to drive by in your car made of pencils -Awesome
p) "STOP CALLING ME PREJUDICE YOU 13 YEAR-OLD, BLACK, FEMALE FUCK" -foobarz
q) They don't have cars in Africa so he'd be fucked when it comes to fixing one -Sudden
r) Too stoned to string a coherent sentence together let alone drive anywhere near a motorway -Divine Rides
s) Too smacked up on happy pills to care -Jason
t) So fucking annoying the the lazy victim will fix his own bloody car and drive off asap -Ice Storm
1. So someone asks you to help him move a shelf. You:
a) Help him, and then refer him to the nearest Shelf-moving service- Rodge_Rabbit
b) Shelves are a political tool for micheal moore's new groundbreaking and 100% true film: "Shelving Democracy" (ps america sucks) - Anduril.
c) Comment on how shelves are dumb, why dont you just leave your shit on the floor. - Jerome
d) "One time i got wasted and set a shelf on fire." - ZeUs!!
e) The bourgeoisie cannot exist without constantly revolutionizing the instruments of production, and thereby the relations of production, and with them the whole relations of society. Conservation of the old modes of production in unaltered form, was, on the contrary, the first condition of existence for all earlier industrial classes. Constant revolutionizing of production, uninterrupted disturbance of all social conditions, everlasting uncertainty and agitation distinguish the bourgeois epoch from all earlier ones. All fixed, fast frozen relations, with their train of ancient and venerable prejudices and opinions, are swept away, all new-formed ones become antiquated before they can ossify. All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face with sober senses his real condition of life and his relations with his kind. Oh, sure, let me help you grab that shelf. - Troll King
f) Pick up the shelf, then start talking about how the shelf doesnt actually care, that we exist independent of the shelf and it does not matter if we move it. - Sarien
g) Shelves are for fags. Only nancyboys need help, anyway. - Ruby
h) "Well Mr. Poppy McChesterton, one time I rode a karma horse. While naked. Asleep. Phrase." - Pearl Jam
i) LOL I had a shelf once. - Lucon
j) LOL - Ivan
k) Godamnit move the shelf yourself, do I look like a fucking shelf mover? Shit damn fuck. - Wadi
l) ^_^ I have 2000 shelves, all brand new and better than yours. 3K USAGE! -Telcat
m) Hey guys I'm screwing a fat chick right now they rule but I don't like chicken. - IlyaZ
n) Hey guys I'm screwing a fat chick right now they rule but I don't like chicken lz0lz0lz - Exotic
o) You're so dumb, I want to- oh, wait, sure! I'd love to! - Awesome
p) Hmm, me carry a ...black... shelf? Are you trying to insinuate something? - foobarz
q) THIS SHELF WILL AID OUR BRETHREN IN THE LIBERATION OF AFRIKAA ZION. - Sudden
r) Here, let me help you. Oh, and I rule- Seriously. I worship myself at night- If I was a dildo, I would fuck myself. - Divine Rides
s) This shelf was designed with only the simple in mind. We can add a cupholder there, vector the wood sculpture to the left, and voila! - Jason
t) LOL that shelf sux my shelves are better, check em out. - IceStorm
2. Your car breaks down on the motorway, you're driving past and you reckognise the hapless victim as a fellow forum user, do you:
a) Fix his car, no, buy him a whole new car and give him enough petrol money for the next 12 months -Rodge
b) Piss him off even more -Anduril
c) Blame it on Michael Moore and proceed to flick your long floppy hair in a nonchelant and seductive manner -Jerome
d) Swear a lot, say something British and run off giggling -ZeUs!!
e) Give the most logical, sensible and boring explanation about how you failed to look after your car properly and how to fix it efficiently -Troll King
f) Stop and give a lecture on how we are all slaves to the capitalist system and we should rise up and break from these social shackles that tie down and do dick all about the car -Sarien
g) Pull your car to a screeching halt, jump out and run across the remaining lanes of the motorway shouting "DONT WORRY GUYS IM CISCO CERTIFIED GET OUT OF THE WAY HEY YOU IN THE BLUE FIESTA I FUCKED YOUR GIRLFRIEND IVE HAD BETTER LOLOLOLHAHAHAHAROFLEATSHITDIEKTNX" -Ruby
h) Put on your Brian May wig, break out your rock axe and bust out the cheesiest guitar solo while you wait for someone to actually stop and help -Pearl Jam
i) <Post count filler> -Lucon
j) LOL -Ivan
k) Sort your fucking car out, warned and moved to Useless Crap fuckface -Wadi
l) stop and then talk down to the victim in a derogatory manner "You're so stupid everyone knows how to wire a car I've got three degrees in professional car wiring, car wiring for professionals and wiring a car professionally AND I'VE GOT 5K USAGE YOU'RE SO DUMB" -Telcat
m) "Tim tang didn't make it on the basketball team, he was really upset" -IlyaZ
n) "Tim tang didn't make it on the basketball team, he was really upset ROFL LOL" -Exotic (thus explaining our ctrl+v joke in Jeansi's sig)
o) Continue to drive by in your car made of pencils -Awesome
p) "STOP CALLING ME PREJUDICE YOU 13 YEAR-OLD, BLACK, FEMALE FUCK" -foobarz
q) They don't have cars in Africa so he'd be fucked when it comes to fixing one -Sudden
r) Too stoned to string a coherent sentence together let alone drive anywhere near a motorway -Divine Rides
s) Too smacked up on happy pills to care -Jason
t) So fucking annoying the the lazy victim will fix his own bloody car and drive off asap -Ice Storm
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