Why I Will Never Eat Frito-Lay Products Again

[Edify]

http://www.zug.com/pranks/olestra/

A link about a substance called Olestra that is a fat substitute that tastes exactly like regular food, but has a bunch of really bad side effects.


I will never again eat Frito Lay products because of this information...

When Olestra was tested on humans, a few wee side effects were found, including loose stools, abdominal cramping, and -- how can I put this delicately -- "anal leakage."

[Sarien]

Rock On.

But I do have one question. When you were working all this out in your head, did it all come together something like:

"No, i won't ever eat Frito-Lay Products ever again, because I read on a practical joke site that they use a fat substitute in specific high impact labeled varieties of their snack foods, and not the regular brands that I currently quite enjoy as a tasty treat."

Or was it something else entirely?

[Jeenyuss]

nothing is wrong with a littler splatter when you're goin up a ladder

or when you're feeling heavy whilst sitting in a chevy

[stark]

I think you'd have to eat a lot of fritos to get the runs

[Edify]

"No, i won't ever eat Frito-Lay Products ever again, because I read on a practical joke site that they use a fat substitute in specific high impact labeled varieties of their snack foods, and not the regular brands that I currently quite enjoy as a tasty treat."

Or was it something else entirely?

No, it was more like.

"This is on the internet, and if something like the Flying Spaghetti Monster can exist, this must be 100% true and I never liked Frito Lay to begin with."

[Subjugation]

I love eating bags and bags of diarreah chips. <3

[DoTheFandango]

You're reading ZUG,
the world's only comedy site.

JESUS CHRIST.

It's like Vegetarianism for retards.

[Sarien]

"This is on the internet, and if something like the Flying Spaghetti Monster can exist, this must be 100% true and I never liked Frito Lay to begin with."

Once again, you've defeated me with your legal mumbo jumbo!

[RATTY...]

Read fast through it, was some funny shit.

"Until that night, when I took a trip to the bathroom to meet the baker. Friends, the creature that emerged from my insides was borne in the pits of Hell and reared in the suburbs of Detroit. This foul monster was so excruciatingly wet and smelly that my eyebrows singed, paint peeled from the walls, and the mirror steamed up. I quickly flushed the toilet, but the beast did not budge. Water began to fill up the basin, and I grabbed the plunger and beat the demon down the toilet. After much struggle and another full flush, the minion was defeated, sent back to the steaming caverns of Hades."

[Sleepy Weasel]

Can I be the first to say you're like several years late on this post? And they only used Olestra in the "WOW" potato chips. My parents bought them briefly when they came out, they weren't that good.

But yeah that guy actually has written a number of amusing things. I like the credit card ones.
http://www.zug.com/pranks/credit/

http://www.zug.com/pranks/credit_card/

[za gophar]

check me if i'm wrong sandy, but olestra isn't in regular fritos is it? it's only in fat free?

[Squeezer]

If you think that website is going to stop me from eating my Sour Cream and Onion/Sour Cream and Cheddar/Cooler Ranch Dorito chips, then you sir are sadly mistaken.

[tugs]

while we're on the subject of diarrhea, is there anybody else here that's had the runs and been puking at the exact same time? just curious

[Vykromond]

Can I be the first to say you're like several years late on this post? And they only used Olestra in the "WOW" potato chips. My parents bought them briefly when they came out, they weren't that good.

But yeah that guy actually has written a number of amusing things. I like the credit card ones.
http://www.zug.com/pranks/credit/

http://www.zug.com/pranks/credit_card/

these are funny

[ZeUs!!]

The only reason that article is funny is the different metaphors for taking a dump, and I don't really like those kind of jokes as they make me think of shit. I'm sure most people refer to a mental image of a cartoon poo or something, but when I hear those jokes I imagine the real deal and its not pretty