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How do you wipe?

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  • How do you wipe?

    I'm reading a thread and it's about how you wipe your butt after taking a dump (it wasn't the original intended topic, but quickly turned that way). It appears it's about half-half people who sit and people who stand.

    WTF


    Stand?

    Who the hell stands to wipe?

    It appears that people who stand to wipe are equally astounded that people sit down to wipe, both parties both being befuzzled by the physics and hygienicness of the opposing method.

    SO here's the question guys: Do you sit or stand to wipe? And while we're at it, you may as well answer the other wiping questions: Do you crumple the paper or fold, and do you go from back to front, or front to back?
    USS Banana after years of superior jav play has amassed 17999 kills, he is 1 kill away from 18k, Type ?go Javs FOR A GAME OF HUNT (no scorereset) -Kim
    ---A few minutes later---
    9:cool koen> you scorereseted
    9:Kim> UM
    9:Kim> i didn't
    9:cool koen> hahahahahahaha
    9:ph <ZH>> LOOOOL
    9:Stargazer <ER>> WHO FUCKING SCORERESET
    9:pascone> lol?

  • #2
    Wipe while in the process of standing.
    front to back
    crumbled
    While I'm sippin herbal teas verbal bees plant fertile seeds
    Bitches leave with broke backs, swollen palms and purple knees

    Comment


    • #3
      1) Sitting, it gets you cleaner.

      2) Front to back.

      3) Why the fuck would you take the time to fold something that's gonna get messed up anyway? Crumple.
      Originally posted by Tone
      It is now time for the energy shift of the 7th root race to manifest on the 3D physical plane and uplift us back to 5D.
      Originally posted by the_paul
      Gargle battery acid fuckface
      Originally posted by Material Girl
      I tried downloading a soundcard

      Comment


      • #4
        interesting question.

        i used to stand to wipe when i was a kid, but once i got tall enough that i could actually see people over the stalls in public washrooms while i was wiping, it became really weird.

        and i fold the paper, can't stand the idea that there might be a tiny hole there for the crap to get on my fingers.

        and finally front to back ftw.

        Comment


        • #5
          i stood up when i was younger but eventually progressed to sitting down, i don't remember why.

          front to back, shitty balls is not my goal

          crumpled because i'm lazy and scared of getting shit on my hands by folding it
          Originally posted by turmio
          jeenyuss seemingly without reason if he didn't have clean flours in his bag.
          Originally posted by grand
          I've been afk eating an apple and watching the late night news...

          Comment


          • #6
            sit
            fold, front to back, fold it again, front to back, fold a third time, front to back.

            Comment


            • #7
              For the record, here is an image of how I do it
              USS Banana after years of superior jav play has amassed 17999 kills, he is 1 kill away from 18k, Type ?go Javs FOR A GAME OF HUNT (no scorereset) -Kim
              ---A few minutes later---
              9:cool koen> you scorereseted
              9:Kim> UM
              9:Kim> i didn't
              9:cool koen> hahahahahahaha
              9:ph <ZH>> LOOOOL
              9:Stargazer <ER>> WHO FUCKING SCORERESET
              9:pascone> lol?

              Comment


              • #8
                i don't poop

                Comment


                • #9
                  Well, you put the main tank on the boss, the offtanks on the adds, and you see what happens.
                  Originally posted by Ward
                  OK.. ur retarded case closed

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    i sit, i only stand if im in some dirty ass bathroom thats not my own

                    I use to crumble, but I find that folding the paper is less wastefull

                    I go from under the balls not from the back, and wipe back to front (I timed it perfectly to not touch the ballz jeen, mad skillz that killz)
                    sigpic
                    All good things must come to an end.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I don't poop. I spacedock.
                      NOSTALGIA IN THE WORST FASHION

                      internet de la jerome

                      because the internet | hazardous

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        This is the best topic to come up in awhile.

                        I prefer the half-sitting/half-standing position in which to wipe my ass. This provides the optimal method for accessing my buttcrack.

                        As for the folding of the toilet paper, I like folding it up over each other. I know some ppl like to use a piece twice to conserve their TP, but I think that's kinda disgusting. So once wipe and then throw into the toilet.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Sit, Front to Back, Crumpled

                          ... who the fuck stands?
                          DELETED

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            fold, and not quite standing, but more standing than sitting.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Wait, you mean you wipe your fuckin' ass, then you fold that toilet paper over the already shitsunken fold and reuse it then fold it again? Wow, that's fuckin' great! For me, I've sticken with just crumpling the goddman toilet paper then proceed to violently wipe, but not too violent, and then look at the toilet paper to see how much shit I've picked up. If it looks pretty dark, I continue wiping with another crumpled up peice until its white.
                              LA

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