well relatively
i went from three packs a day to just one cigarette today, and it sucks
the thing i'm really fighting now is, i'm hungry as fucking shit but i'm poor. TBH, cigarettes kept my food expenses down, which kept my energy bill down (stove/microwave rarely used). so, a carton of camels ($30, lasting three days) generally brought my expenses to about $5 a day for food (fast food for lunch, or ramen), and my electricity bill down to $30 a month (from $90).
so like in a given month, $300 for cigarettes, $30 for energy, and $150 for food.
before i started seriously smoking heavily, I'd do $90 for energy, and then 2 trips per month to the Grocery, $100 each, plus going out to eat. I used to have a huge appetite, so figure $20 a meal at a casual diner. Let's say that was twice a week (weekends), $160 total.
so in a given month, $90 for energy, $200 for groceries, $160 for food.
So me smoking = $480/month, me not smoking = $480.
Fuck. in my head it seemed more expensive to not smoke. But I'm seriously in the grips of some crazy something.. I feel like hyper but chill at the same time. Someone please kill me. I have $14 to my name that isn't going to go towards this months rent which I am like $150 short on anyways (though that's like 9 hours of work so give me the week kz) and there's a cigarette store right across the street. My computer desk is littered with cartons and empty boxes (I have already counted them - 34 - and none of them have a cigarette accidentally left in them). I have two wine bottles packed to the brim with cigarette butts - one Robert Mondavi, one Ecco Domani, both stolen from work and consumed.
It's 1am and I usually go to bed 2 hours ago please, someone murder me.
i went from three packs a day to just one cigarette today, and it sucks
the thing i'm really fighting now is, i'm hungry as fucking shit but i'm poor. TBH, cigarettes kept my food expenses down, which kept my energy bill down (stove/microwave rarely used). so, a carton of camels ($30, lasting three days) generally brought my expenses to about $5 a day for food (fast food for lunch, or ramen), and my electricity bill down to $30 a month (from $90).
so like in a given month, $300 for cigarettes, $30 for energy, and $150 for food.
before i started seriously smoking heavily, I'd do $90 for energy, and then 2 trips per month to the Grocery, $100 each, plus going out to eat. I used to have a huge appetite, so figure $20 a meal at a casual diner. Let's say that was twice a week (weekends), $160 total.
so in a given month, $90 for energy, $200 for groceries, $160 for food.
So me smoking = $480/month, me not smoking = $480.
Fuck. in my head it seemed more expensive to not smoke. But I'm seriously in the grips of some crazy something.. I feel like hyper but chill at the same time. Someone please kill me. I have $14 to my name that isn't going to go towards this months rent which I am like $150 short on anyways (though that's like 9 hours of work so give me the week kz) and there's a cigarette store right across the street. My computer desk is littered with cartons and empty boxes (I have already counted them - 34 - and none of them have a cigarette accidentally left in them). I have two wine bottles packed to the brim with cigarette butts - one Robert Mondavi, one Ecco Domani, both stolen from work and consumed.
It's 1am and I usually go to bed 2 hours ago please, someone murder me.
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