TRON Legacy

[ÆNIMA]

Hey PJ haven't seen you in a while, made me laugh.

I think Lion King almost made me cry at some point (you know, back when it was almost cool for kids to cry).

I'm talking about computer animated movies, BRAh

[Xog]

Are you fucking kidding me? Of course he is. That ridiculous, contrived, crazy talking animal bullshit?! Get real. GET REAL!!!! Animals don't fucking talk bro! Never did and never will (except for parrots and talking dogs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCYaw5tGYAs).

Fun fact: Simba is Somalian for WEAK ASS BUSTER SHIT. Because that's how he brings it. That's how he does it. Weak ass buster shit, bro. For 94 minutes. He set a fucking RECORD for weak ass buster shit. Oh man I'm so lost in my life! I need help from this obese wild boar and this little BITCH lemur-esque animal! Hakuna Matata? More like STOP SMOKING FUCKING HERB AND GET A JOB. Oh nooo I need the spirit of James Earl Jones to tell me what to do! Help me James! Pump your fucking brakes, bitch! I mean you're a talking lion. Go hit up some high profile zoo and do Denis Leary monologues! You'd make BANK.

Matthew Broderick, what the fuck were you thinking? Jesus Christ, you were Ferris Buhler! Looks like you need to go back in time to the day you signed the contract to do the voice acting for Simba's adult voice and take a fucking DAY OFF. "Hey, who does Simba's voice acting as a child? Oh, that mark ass bitch from Home Improvement who has a huge career for 6 years until he isn't a teenager anymore and nobody wants anything to with him? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP!"

From start to finish, the whole story is mad gay (Liberace gay, fucking creamy peanut butter on the crack, raw dog ,put-on-those-silky-smooth-purple-rain-prince-tunes while I run to Target and get some KY gay). I mean talking animals!? I talked to my dog once. I said "Hey, I'm really lonely. So incredibly lonely. I could use some companionship. Someone to vent to. A shoulder to lean on. I mean I feel like all you want to do it eat, shit, and catch the frisbee. I need to know that our relationship means more than that. I need to know that our relationship is REAL." You know what he said? JACK SHIT! You know what he said 3 hours later? STILL JACK SHIT! Then he took a shit! And if my dog's name was Jack, do you know what the coincidence would've been? His shit would've been JACK SHIT!
Well technically JACK'S SHIT, but you get it. Or maybe you don't get it...just like how I don't get how anyone likes this HORSESHIT movie!

Big ups to James Earl Jones, though.

you're making some kid cry

[Squeezer]

the beginning of good things

you's a buster

[Squeezer]

thank you for bringing back BUSTER PJ

I'm going to start using it like it was 1991 all over again.

edit: Val Kilmer and Jeff Bridges aren't GREAT actors. They're pretty good, but at least they tend to also do good movies.

[Summa]

yeah, i shall pass, and instead waste my money on inglorious basterds and 9

and when this movie comes out i will celebrate by watching the old tron....and maybe Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Ooze <----greatest movie evarrrrr amirite?