i hate my friend

[za gophar]

how do i end this type of friendship?

ok, so i was friends with this kid last year, he is the proverbial loser but he had a big heart and was a lot of fun at times. he was fat and timid, and didnt really earn much respect from anyone. it was easy to make fun of him, and he was in general tolerable.

but this year, my other friend and him became roommates. the fat loser is the type of person who just screams only child (even though he isnt one), and he really cant deal with a roommate. so that turned into world war III. plus, it seems that all his good qualities disappeared over the summer. he ended up throwing a chair at my other friend, and they got in a fight, he broke his thumb, and he moved to a single room in another building.

i was pissed at him, needless to say, but i told myself i would forgive him. thing is, i learned that forgiving someone isnt just something that you say. i really dont like this guy any more. he is a lazy, sac of shit, stubborn, jerk, dense, self centered, fat, smelly pig. no exaggeration. one of the most worthless people ive ever met. i am ashamed to even look him in the eye anymore.

sad thing is, i'm the only one he could really consider his friend. i honored him even when people didnt want to hang out with me because i was with him. if i want to cease our friendship, but i dont know how. do i just say "fuck yourself" or stop hanging out with him or what.

[Darius Winds]

Give him the boot. Don't sacrifice yourself for someone who just fucks things up and doesn't do a rats ass about it.

Now if you are anarchy punk and go oi oi oi and listen to some awesome hardcore punk like goodcharlottttttte, then d00d, be a punk. who gives a fuck?

[Subjugation]

Has he talked to you about it, or apologized? I would explain to him why you don't want to spend time with him. That way he knows what he did wrong and you give him the opportunity to learn from the experience. If he doesn't learn from it, hey---that's his problem. It sounds like he has poor social skills and maybe some self esteem problems.

It sounds gay, but if you guys were actually close at one time, I'd just tell him the way it is. It's not gay to be honest about why you don't want to hang out with him. What is gay is if you tell him you want to blow him.

If it is his fault, then maybe losing the friendship will remind him of why he should appreciate the friendship. And if they still don't appreciate it when it's gone, I don't think that person is capable of knowing how to be a friend at this point in his life.

[Kawrae]

He will commit a suicide anyway so it doesn't matter what you say. You can just make it happen faster. Soon he will realize how rejected he is. Soon he will so broken that he will be thinking the meaning of life without getting the answer. Soon he will die to his lonelyness. Soon is very soon. Facts are facts. Can't help it. Your friends is in deeep shit.

[za gophar]

hm, i forgot about that. he has been threatening suicide since this summer.

you may well be right. i would say that i dont think he has the stones to do it, but in retrospect that might look awfully stupid.

ill tell him to get some meds or something. that's all i can do. i have tried to reason with him all that i can. i have tried to be subtle, i have tried to be blunt. it wont work. i cant do anything.

[Darius Winds]

This would be the Theory of Natural Selection. It would only be natural to feel contempt and pity as well as sadness and deeper emotions because we are only human, and I am not being judgemental of you in any way. If my happiness were at the stake of someone who so ignorantly tarnishes his life and the life of others, then I would rather leave him in benefit of my own happiness. He may commit suicide, and you may feel obliged to help. Now the question is, how far will you help him as to not feel guilty if he does kill himself? I say I find it highly improbable that there is any human level in which we find ourselves free of remorse. Anyone could feel guilty for not saving life that they feel they could save. You should be proud to witness the strengthening of your species.

[Subjugation]

If only that were true. Natural selection doesn't really apply to humans who live in moden societies anymore. The stupid, ugly and the weak are just as likely to procreate---probably moreso, actually---than those who are considered "more fit".

Fitness, in evolutionary terms, relates to the ability for an individual to create viable offspring. And by viable, that means another individual that is able to procreate.

The reason why it doesn't apply to the modern human species is because we have found a shortcut out of one of the key tenents of Darwinian evolution: we don't have nearly the limited resources that other primate or animal species have. For example, if you're poor, you can go on the dole or welfare, or beg on the streets to survive. Basically, modern human altruism has dramatically lowered the impact that limited resources and social class has in other species of animals.

Even someone who is ugly and broke will probably find a woman desperate enough to be impregnanted with 1 or 20 kids, and chances are, their kids will also be physically able to reproduce. Therefore, both people have done their primal duty to continue their genetic line.

Yes, I know it's counterintuitive. It may not seem fair. But it's unavoidable that idiots will continue polluting our genepool. But hey, work had and get an education and they will probably be working for you someday.

[Darius Winds]

Humanity will reach perceived scientific perfection through advancements in technology. I mean, look at the Genome product, advancements of nanoprobes on reducing and eliminating cancer cells, and further experiments with genetics. Eventually, we will all be null, bald, and every language will be combined into one.

[Superted]

Try talking to him first, ask him what's up etc, if nothing comes of it politly suggest he move out as it's 'not working out', help him find another flat and help him move. After him moving out, you may become freinds with him again.

[Subjugation]

Humanity will reach perceived scientific perfection through advancements in technology. I mean, look at the Genome product, advancements of nanoprobes on reducing and eliminating cancer cells, and further experiments with genetics. Eventually, we will all be null, bald, and every language will be combined into one.

Someone check his IP plz. Or maybe he's just been indoctrinated into the Church of Tone.

[Darius Winds]

Someone check his IP plz. Or maybe he's just been indoctrinated into the Church of Tone.

It's American TV culture. A joke for people of the States, if any who see the show are one of it's millions of viewers.

[Pressure Drop]

i had a friend a bit like that once. He was suicidial and unpredictable when drunk, once he smashed a vodka bottle off his fireplace becuase i didn't agree with him, and another time he scrabbed himself with his fingers the whole way up his arm till he bled becuase again i disagreed with something trivial. He used to cut himself alot too.

Ultimately this behaviour isn't normal and i started to dislike him even though we were once close friends. So i had a talk with him and told him that he needed help and unless he tried to get help i wasn't willing to be his friend anymore becuase i wasn't going to be held responcible for his actions or self abuse.

He agreed that he needed help but told me he wasn't going to get any so i stopped being his friend which was hard becuase we had mutual friends but they were all quite understanding about the whole thing as they had been there when he went off the rails.


I'd suggest doing something along those lines. Have a talk with him and tell him you find his behaviour unacceptable and unless he changes it, which he needs to do to live a healthy lifestyle in society, you aren't willing to be his friend. Of course don't accept any bullshit and if he goes back to his old ways or refuses to change stop being friends with him.

[Kawrae]

I know these things Za.

[za gophar]

what's your story?

[Kim]

watashi mo tomodachi ga suki dewa arimasen