Trench Wars Recipe Collection

[Avelate]

Thats great

Don't forget the 1 dose of Rufees for the girl

Stfu fucking sex-crazed teens...

[K Money]

first things first fellas, make sure the girl's willing- no rapists or dead horsers in my kitchen.

2 cups sopping wet pussy
a dash of salty clit
4 pounds of tounge/jaw endurance
7 revolutions around the magic bead
a few dips in the suez

mix a scooping motion hand job with one or two fingers with some good, delicate but not too delicate clit licking and find a rhythm

put that shit on simmer for a while and wait till her back arches up or she gives some sort of other signal then give her a slight break before repeating or seeing if she wants to entertain your little carrot

Don't forget the 1 dose of Rufees for the girl

[Cops]

Cops grab what you can and blend it!

grab everything edible around the house and blend it until it's smooth and then proceed to knock it back.

[code]

best recipe ever

[Divine Rides]

So you wanna eat some pussy?

first things first fellas, make sure the girl's willing- no rapists or dead horsers in my kitchen.

2 cups sopping wet pussy
a dash of salty clit
4 pounds of tounge/jaw endurance
7 revolutions around the magic bead
a few dips in the suez

mix a scooping motion hand job with one or two fingers with some good, delicate but not too delicate clit licking and find a rhythm

put that shit on simmer for a while and wait till her back arches up or she gives some sort of other signal then give her a slight break before repeating or seeing if she wants to entertain your little carrot

[code]

don't forget the basil & tomatillo's.. gotta use them roma tomatoes btw. cheers.

[Subjugation]

fresh salsa

i was just fuckin around in the kitchen making salsa the other day, and i thought it would be nice to add some avocados. it came out pretty good, and nobody has a fresh salsa recipe in here (that i noticed) so i thought i'd drop one by.

i'll just start out by giving you the salsa recipe. now, this is just a basic salsa recipe, but you can tweak it if you have any particular preferences. if you like a more or less of anything, like onion or cilantro or tomato, you can change it to your liking:

1/2 med yellow onion (med diced)
2 med tomatos (med diced)
1/2 a bunch of cilantro (well chopped)
3-4 cloves of garlic (finely chopped)
2 jalapenos (finely diced...btw, this should make it spicy. use only one if you prefer a mild salsa. conversely, add another if you like it very hot)

season with salt and lime juice to taste. your salsa will taste dispassionate if it has too much or too little of these two ingredients, so make sure to season with care---and passion is the word i would assiociate most with latin cuisine.

for an additional twist, add diced avocados, or diced and peeled cucumbers, OR even mangos. i know that sounds crazy, but trust me, it's good if you want to add a tropical twist. a mang0-cucumb3r-av0cad0 salsa is AMAZING doloped on top of a lovely piece of fish. i'd recommend this with a halibut or ahi tuna.

congradulations. you are now an honorary mexican.

[Gemfire]

Chicken and Rice:

2 cans cream of celery soup
2 cans cream of mushroom soup
2 cans cream of chicken soup
1 can water
2 cups medium grain white rice
1 small chicken

Mix the soups, water, and rice together in a bowl.Place in the bottom of a roaster. Place chicken on top(we substituted plain old chikcen legs, and it worked out fine....16 of them(family of 5)). Bake at 350 degress for 3 1/2 hours. Then enjoy.

[Facetious]

The best non-alchoholic drink ever

Just mix Coke and fruit punch, it tastes so good! We were playing a joke on my friend and poured some fruit punch in her Coke when she got up, and when she came back she noticed and said it was good so we all tried it and it was awesome.

For the record, I tried this and it was terrible.

Reading that actually made me laugh out loud.

[code]

Lemon Egg Drop Soup

Mouth Watering Lemon Egg Drop Soup
============================
3 1/2 Cups Chicken Broth or Water
2 or 3 Eggs (only the whites)
1 1/2 Green Onion Chopped or Minced
1/2 Cup Scallion Chopped or Minced
2 Dried or Fresh Bay Leaves (can be removed after cooking)
Minced Fresh Parsley to taste or [ts] of dried parsley flakes
Salt to taste (sea salt)
Dash of White or Black Pepper (optional)
Juice from 1 Lemon
3 [tbsp] Parmesan or Romano cheeses <El Trigal Mancheso a type of Hard Goat Cheese is also nice> (optional)
2 Stalks Celery (optional)
1/2 Cup Basmati Rice (optional)
1/4 [ts] of Flour <all purpose, potato, rice, any will do> (optional)


Delicious Chicken Egg Drop Soup
========================
see above then follow directions below...

Notes: Remove Juice from 1 Lemon
or any others you don't desire

Add: [ts] soy sauce
1/2 Cup Shredded and cooked Chicken


enjoy

[Subjugation]

EZ mexican rice in less than 30 minutes

anyone who likes mexican food probably likes mexican rice, because it's such a common staple of the culture. there are many ways to make mexican rice. some are very complicated, involving time consuming prepwork like making your own chicken stock, and dicing fresh vegetables, and going to the mex grocery market for authentic herbs and seasonings.

but fuck all that.

that's totally unnecessary when you can still make great tasting mexican rice in 25 min from start to finish with stuff most adults keep in their pantry anyway, and exerting minimal effort. how, you ask?

well... make sure you have:

>1/2 cup of chunky salsa (whatever spice level you prefer)
>1 cup of rice (i always use jasmine)
>2 tbl butter
>2 boullion cubes (or the equivalent to 2 cups of chicken broth)
>2 oz. olive oil (and as always...DON'T USE XTRA VIRGIN FOR THIS)
>2 cloves of garlic
>1 teaspoon kosher salt (use 1/2-3/4 teaspoon if you have the regular iodized stuff)

gather a small pot (about a 2 quart size) and the rest of your ingredients.

take your rice and don't even bother washing it, cuz the frying process will eliminate the starch problem (if you don't know what i'm talking about, just nod your head and pretend you do). toss the cup of rice in your pot, and add your oil. mix the oil and rice up together, and make sure it's thoroughly coated, and then put it on a med-hi flame. when it starts to sizzle, this is the point where you have to start constantly stirring your rice. keep cooking your oiled rice on the med-hi flame until it starts browning and becoming a lovely golden color. when it's golden, and JUST before it starts burning, add 2 cups of water, and then the rest of your ingredients (butter, boullion, salsa, salt, and 2 cloves of whole garlic. yes whole cloves of garlic, because like me, you're too lazy to mince it, and the flavor will infuse during the cooking process ).

bring to a boil, and make sure you stir your stuff until the butter is melted, and the boullion dissolves.

turn to the lowest possible flame and cover for 15-20 min.

uncover and stir again. c'mon baby, fluff up all that spicy goodness. now you are ready to enjoy that rice either alongside or INSIDE a nice burrito, or just by itself.

congradulations, you are now an honorary mexican.

[Prolifik]

B)

[Subjugation]

Best Potato Salad Ever

hate to rip off another chef's recipe, so i'll give him credit. it's actually an emeril recipe which i tried out, and this potato salad was the best i had. i edited a little bit of it to make it more understandable to the beginner cook. i really hope you guys enjoy it as much as i did.

EMERIL'S FAVORITE POTATO SALAD

INGREDIENTS:
------------------------------------------------------------------------

Around 8 small red bliss potatos (about 2 1/2 pounds)*
8 slices crisp cooked bacon, crumbled
6 hard-boiled eggs, roughly chopped
1/3 cup finely chopped red onion
2/3 cup finely chopped celery
1 cup ranch dressing
2 tablespoons chopped parsley leaves
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper

*if you're an experienced cook, skip over this and continue to the preparation part. but if you need a little help, be sure to continue reading. picking out the appropriate type and size of potatos is always key, but when the highlight of the dish IS potatos, then you have to be sure to use your brain. "a small potato" is a relative term. for this dish, it means a potato about 2 inches in diameter. pick the clean looking ones with few abberations. eyes are ok, and normal, but if you see bruising, or rot, skip it and select a better choice. and when boiling or roasting potatos, always make sure they are about the same size. this way all the potatos cook evenly, and you don't get one potato that is cooked perfectly, while a much bigger potato in your same batch is still raw and crunchy in the center.

PREPARATION:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Place the potatoes in a pot big enough to fit them all and add enough water to cover by at least 1-inch. Bring to a boil over high heat and cook until the potatoes are just tender, about 15 to 20 minutes. Drain, cool, then cut the potatoes into bite sized pieces. if the potatos are small, cut them in sixths, if they are very small, cut them into quarters.

In a large mixing bowl combine potatoes with all remaining ingredients and gently toss to combine.

Refrigerate the salad several hours before serving to allow flavors to blend. in fact, if you can, i recommend preparing it a day ahead. this really gives the potatos a chance to absorb all that great flavor, and the veg still have a fantastic crunch.

[Subjugation]

tomato sauce with meat....

In honor of the season opener of the sopranos, i decided to post something italian.

making your own sauce is key to any truly authentic italian dish. and the best part about making the sauce, is you can make it ahead of time, and just heat it up and serve it with just about ANY kind of pasta and have a nice italian dinner.


TOMATO SAUCE WITH ITALIAN SAUSAGE*

*note: for the meat, you can choose just about anything you want. you can use chicken tenders, lean ground beef, lean italian sausage...in this case, believe it or not, i used spicy italian TURKEY sausage (it is way better than it sounds). the key to the meat is use a good quality product, and note, the more lean the sausage is, the less greasy the final product will be.

>1 lb uncooked sausage (when using sausage, be sure to remove the casings, and use about 1/2 inch chunks)

>27 oz can of plain tomato sauce (if they don't have the big can, just use 2 small ones. the difference in size isn't large enough to matter)

>2 cups of white wine

>2oz regular olive oil (not extra virgin)

>2 yellow bell peppers, cleaned, seeded, and medium diced

>one small yellow onion, medium diced

>5 medium sized cloves garlic, finely chopped

>fresh herb medley, chopped. i used a 1/2 bunch flat-leaf parsley, 1/2 bunch of basil, and a pinch of rosemary and thyme (seriously, fresh herbs make a tremendous difference in flavor. if you can afford them, and can find them....you should definitely use fresh instead of dried)

PREPARATION:

get a nice deep pot with a heavy bottom. i use a 2-gallon one, so the tomato sauce doesn't splatter all over the walls.

put about 2 oz reg olive oil in the bottom of your pot on med-hi heat.

when it barely starts to smoke, add your meat and give it a stir. let sit until the meat starts to brown.

add your onions, and let them cook in with the sausage until they start to get translucent. make sure you stir frequently to avoid uneven cooking (about 2 thorough stirs a minute).

at this point, you can lower your heat from med-hi to medium.

now add your peppers and chopped garlic, and continue to stir regularly until the peppers start to get soft and cooked down.

now that all your main ingredients are properly cooked, lets add the jazzy flavor. add your 2 cups of white wine. i like chardonnay, but the grape varietal isn't terribly crucial.

with the wine in there, you can turn up the heat again. reduce the wine down pretty good, so there's not much liquid left in there. i'd advise reducing by 3x (this means when you look into the pot, you should see about 2/3 cup of liquid along with your other goodies).

okay, now with the liquid reduced, turn the heat back down to medium again, lest you burn yo' sheeeit.

add your tomato sauce, and freshly chopped herb medley, and if you like it very spicy, add about a tablespoon of crushed red chilies. if you only like it a little spicy add only 1/2 a tbl. wait till the end of the cooking process to salt the sauce.

at this point, you're home free. reduce the heat to low, and cook that shit for about 30-40 minutes to marry all those lovely flavors, and to reduce the tomato sauce a little bit to give it a nice boost of intensity. at the end of the cooking, add salt to taste. the reason you always add salt at the end of cooking is because the overall flavor will change from the beginning till the end. this is especially true with reduction sauces, or cream sauces.

now, add this sauce to whatever kind of pasta you like. i prefer penne, or rigatoni. i even use this recipie (minus the sausage) to make my lasagna.

make sure you have some grated parmesean on hand to sprinkle on the top with. this makes it teh win.

[Pandagirl!]

Smoothies, Turnovers, Tarts, and Fondues,
Or maybe some Pies, some Puffs, a Pone or two?
I'd like to see some Wafers, Jumbles, perhaps a Brule,
Suggest a Sundae, a Dumpling, with a Flambé!
Could I see some Ambrosia, some Drops with a Glaze if I dare,
Where are the Puddings, the Snaps and the Squares?
I want my Pastries flakey, soft, and not too Little,
Along with some Trifles and Tortes alongside Brittle!
The Sugar is high and the Calories more,
Control yourself, Gluttony's a Whore.

LOL